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A Timely Bitch

About my newspaper

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The rantings and ravings of Mellie, coming to your house since late Beta.

41

I'm Back...Part 1!

8 • Day 389, 21:17 • Published in USA USA •

It has been almost three weeks since I last wrote anything, and I feel like there is a lot I have to unload from my chest (don’t worry boys, it’s not the twins).

Congress
After winning the congress race in Alaska, I have been diligently

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23

Alaskan Congressional Bid

8 • Day 370, 23:47 • Published in USA USA •

My Fellow eRepublikans –

It is time to get real. In this campaign, there are tons of people promising to implement legislation in the eUSA if elected to congress. The fact of the matter is, implementing legislation is a time consuming and

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51

The Wimminz Runs For Congress!

37 • Day 363, 23:45 • Published in USA USA •

Greetings My Fellow eAmericans!

For those of you who may not know me, my name is PrincessMedyPi. For most of my eLife, I have lived in the nation of eTurkey. Born an eAmerican, I emigrated to Turkey in August to fight the fascism of the onrche

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21

eUSA Verbal Artistry Tournament & Battle Royale

5 • Day 359, 10:35 • Published in USA USA •

After watching how much you meat sticks all love to verbally brawl, I have determined that it is time to see what you are made of. I am going to be putting on a verbal artistry tournament, and the grand prize will be the bragging rights to the only

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33

My Emigration

37 • Day 354, 19:20 • Published in Turkey Turkey •

My Fellow eTurks -

I have remained quiet for days as I contemplated my future. Today is the day that I regretfully inform you that this has been my last day in the nation of Turkey. The sociopolitical climate of this nation and it's economic

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