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(Read this aloud and you'll get the angovit soonenuf)

Randeer in ingaland weeva noo king, wel dats wot dem in dannin street sed neway.

Dey teluz we need ta selybrayt. Dey teluz ta rite sumit like ow wot a chav sez, onacawnt ov ow owa nu king Jamezw iz wun. Naw I no it ayunt xatlee eybrow but i fourt idd giv it larj like iz in ibeefa on ma olladay an do wun cos I cun git ma ands on suma dat cancel muny.



I telya wot, rand ma manna we b wanned up. Ya see, we wer towld dat weed git ta pik oow we wanna b awa king, afta it al wennof wen talun got electad wiv de owul rveeb cokup. Outta no wur wev bin towld by sum mexecun dat eevun dow woldi an da blu teem waz winan de yewnean flag iz naw mayda Burberry an da letta aitch az bin taykun offa mowsta owa wurds.



Naw lowdsa ya owtdair aint erd bowt dis cos ov ow evreewun oow faut forrit da lasst go av sed dat dey aint axeptun dis noo king an woldi iz stil owa rainin monak oweva der iz a reziztunz deturmind ta ovafrow de impozta an git woldi bak in buknim palaz.

Mowzt peepul ah wiv uz ya see, onna resunt pol senee pursen ov pepul asct sed dat woldi wuz stil king, wiv ownli tweniwan pursen ov de rezt sayein dat jamezw is like.



Iv u wan a king oow iza mericun, and maycz treytaz paahta de royul famli, den stik wiv hoo de guvamunt sez but iv u wanna joyun up, git onta de forumz an siyun oop tadai, innit.


Sawted, safe, seezya bruv.