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Day 2,169, 13:56 Published in USA USA by Aeriadne
re·tire [ri-tahyuh r] verb, re·tired, re·tir·ing, noun, verb (used without object)
1. to withdraw, or go away or apart, to a place of privacy, shelter, or seclusion: He retired to his study.
2. to go to be😛 He retired at midnight.
3. to withdraw from office, business, or active life, usually because of age: to retire at the age of sixty.
4. to fall back or retreat in an orderly fashion and according to plan, as from battle, an untenable position, danger, etc.
5. to withdraw or remove oneself: After announcing the guests, the butler retired.

It was Artela's article that ultimately made me decide to retire.


In my time in this game, I have written one hundred and fifty-three articles for my two respective papers. Adding in the amount of articles I've written for the WHPR, the Pony Express, and on behalf of various media departments for parties, and including the articles I've ghost written for presidents like Colin Lantrip, I would estimate that the sum total of my articles written in this game numbers somewhere in the low two hundreds. And that has not been for naught; I have been Secretary of Media under eight different administrations. That ranks me up there with the likes of rainy sunday, Blank Keating, ligtreb, and many others who were cabinet niche positions: people who were just filled in every month in certain spots because that's just what they did and were good at.

Over the course of three years, I have been Party President three times: twice for the UIP, and once for the Stardust Crusaders (may they rest in the sands). With this current congress, I will have been elected to congress 7 times. I have been Director of Espionage Operations, or whatever the fuck I was called, for SEES. I was FBI Director of the Feds. I was Minster of Fun for and Vice President and Food Program Director and MM Director (fun times) for many different organizations and many different parties, ranging from the UIP to the USWP to the Feds to SEES to the Stardust Crusaders to LAP the Libs.

My point is, I have done a lot in this game.

It was in latter half of 2011, after I had been SoM a few times in a row, that I began asking Presidents if I could have a different position. Nothing important. Just a deputy job in State, or shadowing someone in Defense, or helping someone with CoS. Since then, I have asked every single potential POTUS that has approached me if they would give me such a job. Some have been strangers, many have been close friends.

I was always denied.

"I need you in Media," they would say. "You don't have experience with the thing you want," they would argue. "You're good at writing and nothing else," is all I would ultimately hear.

This drove me insane.

My frustration with being put upon a shelf and not given a chance to do anything else fueled some bad decisions over my course of game play. I almost single-handedly burned the UIP to the ground and alienated the one group of friends who had always legitimately been there for me, in game and out. I called SEAL Team 6, an MU I had had nothing but joyous experiences with, a mechanism of this game's downfall. I burned bridges, I raged against the machine. I quit. I rejoined. I quit. I rejoined.

And here we are today.

I had been trying to get back into National politics, I really had. I was playing nice. At the recommendation of friends, I played the game. This time, I could see myself setting up for a POTUS run in a few months. I got drawn in again, and it was decent and fun and I was doing some good work and maybe getting a chance as Deputy Secretary of Defense in Artela's cabinet.

But small lingering consternation still remained. I could feel I had an uphill battle and I had to play my cards right if I ever wanted the one thing I kept coming back to this game for: a CP medal. But through it all, I managed to stay quiet, and progress. I worked hard in this game over the last month or so to do the right things I think would further that goal.

This last weekend, one of my best friend's tried to take their life. If I had not dropped everything and been there for them... the outcome is not something I like to think about. Needless to say, I was shaken. They approached me very oddly. They asked if I was happy. And you know, in real life? I've been pretty happy. I had a rough run and have struggled with some personal problems over the years, but I have managed to get to a pretty good place.

And then they began talking oddly. Past tense. Saying thank you for it all, and keep strong.

It shook me.

I tend to think a lot, and I've spent the last weekend thinking very seriously about the important things in my life and what I'm doing to make my own life meaningful. How I can find true happiness. And honestly, eRep had not entered into my mind at all.

And then I logged on yesterday and saw Artela's article.

It is the single most pitiful attempt at writing a Presidential announcement article I think I can recall. Excluding the links and flavor text and focusing solely on the content writing, it's around 200 words. And there is no meat. Her reason for running is basically that she's done the job before, worked hard this last month, and thus deserves a third term.

And that's fine. She did a good job. She did the job she was assigned to do. She has kept this country running, and I'm sure her presidency will bring about more of the same holding pattern.

But in reading her article, I realized something very fundamental about the game we are all playing today: we're done. When a Presidential hopeful can release an article of that poor of quality and be expected to be the one who will probably win it without any opposition, we have admitted defeat.

There is no competition left in us. There's no fight. There's no excitement. At least with Ajay we had an enemy, but even that got boring. It got to be a monthly task we had to deal with, as banal as clipping one's toenails. Presidential elections have now come down to a small group of people talking about who should probably run and making it happen. We're still in the Unity mindset... and we're never leaving it.

Because there aren't enough actives left around to put up any sort of real challenge.

I've heard baby boom tossed around, but nobody actually wants to put in the work. I've read dumb congressional conversations about how taxes might bring back people. We have taxes figured out, and frankly? The average player doesn't give a shit about something as boring as taxes. The heart of this game is competition.

I remember a time of three way POTUS races where you didn't know who would win. I remember backstabbing and cabinet stealing, and article wars, and forum spats, and genuine debates.

Not this world. This world is a disgusting excuse for what we were.


And so I am retiring. I don't have the time left to spend to suck enough dick and prove myself with enough fake things in order to get a pretend medal and keep a fake country running. There's no fun to it anymore. That's just all we have left: a bunch of pretend stuff we imbue with meaning.

We are playing with shadows and eating ash, and pretending it's still day near dawn. We want the glory of a Frost regime, but all that's been given is a very reasonable solution to our failure to even put up a resistance to our enemies.

Our problems are not without; they are within. We don't have people, and we won't get them.

Say we bring a baby boom. They'll be born into a world where POTUS is decided, not elected. Where parties are the same, and no genuine pride or culture exists to distinguish them. Where MUs are judged different solely on their uniform and damage output.

It's taken a long while to really grasp at the mechanics of this game, but we've essentially figured it all out by now. So if you say something against that, it's wrong. There's no room for discussion: we know how the world works, and you are wrong. We are living in a fun vacuum, where all we care about is putting more coal in our train that keeps losing cars so that we can get... where?

We are going through the motions. And I can't do it. I can't keep pretending this game is any fun to play, or even that there are differences in the communities which makes them fun. There is no rivalry, no competition. We let it die. We killed it.

And I don't want to be CP.

That used to mean something, CP. We used to want difference in the office, sometimes. We wanted to experience different play styles, different rulers. There were real, legitimate arguments to be had over who we wanted in office. Now, it's just polite discussion over who we should let do the job this time.

Do we want that four term POTUS, or this two term one? Which of the people who've done it before should we let do it again? They know the job. They'll do it to the adequacy of their abilities.

I remember this one POTUS election where we had a new player running. This was a while back, and the guy was still green. He wasn't into the meta, and hardly anybody was subbed to his paper or had ever heard of him. But he was running for POTUS, and he went through his articles outlining each of the ways he would do it.

I'm not saying we shouldn't have elected that guy or regretting we derided him. We should never have elected someone who was still a low level 20 and not even a congress person or party president. Why should we? We had people like Krems and Colin running around, Emerick bashing foreigners, and Alexander Hamilton raging in the threads. We had Glove and Cerb and a whole cast of old timers who would put up a solid campaign.

And that's excluding the new underdogs who could have given people a run for their money. CROy, Hadrian X, hell, back in the day I probably could have done it if I hadn't blown myself apart.

But the underdogs are gone. That part of our culture is eliminated. Because in our old age, as we watch the inevitable end of this game slowly approach us, we don't want that fire anymore apparently.

There are no underdogs left. We have suffocated them and smothered them. There are only the people who have done it before, and if you want to be a new guy, you have to bust your ass so hard that you might as well have done the job before. Prove yourself three times over.

That's all we want.

And that's all we're gonna get.

And I don't want to live in that world.

And I don't want to be that kind of CP ever.

Artela's first, pitiful campaign article proved to me, in just a moment's glance, that we are have arrived at the Age of Uncaring. A notion of apathy has swept our political discourse. There are no new people left to do the job. CP will now, and forever be, the thing that the well-known, established man will do forever more.

No surprises.

No competition.

No fun.

And I'm done.

I've quit before. That's not this. I'm just retiring. I will spend my term in congress voting my party's line, maybe contributing to the forum occasionally. And then I will fade. I will return to the Feds, because that's where the most people I know are and parties are cliques these days with no other distinguishable features other than the different people in each one. I'll bounce around, find some rabble to rouse, two-click, sit on forums, and watch the game decay into into it's inevitable Big Crunch.

The winners of my last article contest are as follows:

Best Overall Article: Evry
Most Shouted Artilce: DylanBAS
Best Farce Article: Nicholas Ryan
Best Mascot Suggeste😛 curtis1227
Most Seen on IRC: TellUrGrlThx
Most Vote😛 Evry
Under 100 Words: Kooguy

Everyone else who entered gets gold as well, so don't worry. You all wrote fine articles and filled the media in different ways. It was a nice parting gift, so thank you.


This is the last article I ever write in this game. I've done enough. 153 is a good number, it seems to me. So it's time for those traditional last bits to go off on.

First, people. This list will be short, cus I've made it before, so it's just gonna address some people I didn't quite get to thank last time.

To MelissaRose: thank you. We've known each other longer than I've known some people in my real life. You've always been there for me, and you've helped me hobble along through the last month or so. Do what makes you happy, dear. And fuck all the rest.

To Hale26 and DMJ: you made the USAF a wonderful home for me, along with many others, and you two have always been nothing if not accommodating. It was fun, and I'll stick around the USAF chans for as long as they exist to help in whatever way I can. It's the least I can do to repay a good time.

To Paul Proteus: thank you for unknowingly make me come out of the closet about being a former player. Your reaction was priceless. Pity I wasn't in your cabinet (and no, I will not stop giving you shit for that). GL on your RL stuff. You'll do great.

To Saraht0ga and John Killah: as a disciple of Dio, I formally consecrate your marriage with His holy sands. The fire will melt snow and let it wash away. The fire burns the sand but makes it stay as glass. Let you be the glass of sand. I wish you happy years. Dio's blessing be upon you, as well as mine.

To Iamnameless and Talostastic: when I rejoined the game in January, you two were nothing if not kind and gracious in your advice and help. Iam, you made the new MU mechanic easy to understand, and Talo your help with the WTP was very welcome. Both of you are wonderful greeters, and any noob should be lucky enough to know you like I was.

To Mazzy Cat: mrow?

To Josh Frost: the Revolution, the world wars, the invasion of Mexico, and now the success of this recent ATO. You've done a lot. You've been a player and great guy to pal around with. Thank you for your continued work and the opportunities you've given me, with SEAL Team 6 and more. You've made it fun.

To Thedillpickl: how are you still alive? I'm glad to see you're happy in Switzerland. Keep at it man.

To irule777: ur p kool.

To rainy sunday: yeah, you know.

To Pfeiffer: thank you for the Media Mogul medal. It meant an extraordinary amount to me to see that pinned to my old profile. Vaya con Dio.

To Malarkey83: I'm proudest of you. You were my noob, and you've done good things. I'm glad to have known you, both before and after. You've got a heart of gold and worth ethic of steel. Out of everyone I've met upon returning, I'm happiest to have met you.

There's plenty of other personal thank yous I could make, but I don't want to get more blustery than I already have. You know who you are. Shoot me a PM.

It's now time for a final request.

The last time I quit I mentioned I did a lot of this same stuff, but there's one thing that was quietly ignored. A plea.

A sum of 5 gold will be given to whoever writes a good enough wiki page for me. I've always wanted one, and honestly I'm too lazy to do it myself. Sorry, but I do get to be a little selfish. So 5 gold to the person who writes my wiki page.

Given that's it's been two and a half years since that offer was made and thus some interest would have accrued, I would like to repropose.

A sum of 100 gold will be given to whoever takes it up to interview and subsequently write a good wiki page for both Aramec and Athanaric.

I'm just selfish like that. Wanting to be remembered and all. I mean, who doesn't? I arguably made my name with my original newspaper by doing interviews. It'd be nice to interviewed again for a change. Maybe publish it in a paper or something. I don't know.

Anyhow.

I suppose that's it. Not much in terms of a last article. I don't particularly have any hopes of getting it to the Top 5 spot or anything, not that that means much these days. Not much means much these days except for, as always, the community.

I'm sorry I couldn't do it.

Biggest regret? Probably the UIP. It's also one of my happiest triumphs. I'm no good at peace time stuff like this, this boring game of numbers. I've always thrived in the fight. There's really only been three things I'm good at in this game: writing, organizing events, and making lists. It's what I enjoy. I suppose you can throw rabble rousing under organizing events. It just gets so boring without the conflict. I'll be around for holidays, probably giving out gifts and such like I used to. Always loved the holidays.

I'm rambling at this point. Trying to figure out what there is left to say. I don't really want to put down the pen and paper, but here we are. For the first time in a long while, I don't see much the use of continuing it.

I'll be around.

I'll be here to the last.

This is Athanaric and Aramec, signing off at last.

Stay frosty.