The Mysterious Box - newspaper of Kentel

22

Salutations and Insults

6 • Day 932, 16:18 • Published in Russia Russia

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So, I have two sections to this article. Shockingly enough, they are Salutations and Insults.

Salutations

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Allow me to introduce myself. I am Kentel.

24

A Demand for President Chocolate McSkittles

11 • Day 931, 07:25 • Published in USA USA

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So, here I was sitting in South Africa. I was thinking about this upcoming World Cup fuss that everyone is talking about. And as I was looking through everything, I came across something.

The United States might play Serbia.

17

So, like there was this guy...

5 • Day 926, 19:30 • Published in South Africa

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And this guy was pretty awesome. His name was zamrg. He's who should be president, by the way. Since I know you were wondering what I was thinking.

However South Africa, there is possibly something more important. The day after tomorrow is the

51

Kentel for Congressmen-with-too-much-power

25 • Day 913, 20:05 • Published in Argentina

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Argentina, I sincerely love you. As you may have seen in some past articles, I told you how to properly go about things, namely how to lose Limpopo. I'm glad you followed my instructions so perfectly. That leads me to believe you are all ready for &

7

Why Kentel Isn't Your Man

2 • Day 913, 15:59 • Published in South Africa

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Don't vote for me in Free State. It's just a show. I'm actually running in Argentina. You'll see soon. Huz-ah. … read more »