Join the new world

First order of business is to announce the winner of the contest from the Zyria interview issue. The bogus question-and-answer set is below:

Wow. So what do you do with your free time?

I’m an avid golfer. I also enjoy restoring classic motorcycles. My dad has a 1973 Harley Davidson Shortster 90cc that I helped him retool. Did most of the chrome work myself.

Anyone who knows Zyria knows full well that she doesn’t have any free time.

Congratulations to TylerYates who was the first person to PM me the correct answer. He has received 2 Q5 weapons for his efforts. Look for another fake question-and-answer in the next interview issue!



And now on to today’s topic:

Why you should join the Mobile Infantry (or any other organized military unit)



Besides shooting bugs in a barrel, of course. That goes without saying.


But Spam, you say, I don’t want to have to spend my whole day logging in to this game and hanging out on IRC just to get some supplies!

To which I respon😛 That’s not even close to the benefits gained by becoming a member of an organized military group in general, and the MI in particular. Thanks to the changes in the war module that are set to be rolled out tomorrow, it’s more important than ever to be able to coordinate your damage to benefit your country and its allies. Sure, you could still fight according to the DoD Orders which will point your damage in the right direction, but why not expend it at a time which will turn the battle in our favor? In the new war module, timing is everything, as you get points accrued for every minute you keep the domination bar on your side of the field.

But that’s a simple, practical, and brutal reason to join the MI. Plus, this whole change could just be an April Fools’ Day joke, though clinical studies have shown that admin is missing its collective funny bone, making that less plausible.


Here’s my quick list of why you should consider joining the Mobile Infantry:


1) Camraderie

The MI is a great place to hang out, meet people, mock them mercilessly, and get fed in the process. Some of the best people I have met in this game are in the MI, and it serves me as a home in this game. Plus, we make a habit out of n4n0-bashing, which is almost as much fun as dwarf-tossing and results in many fewer lawsuits.


Yeah, yeah, it’s an internet game. This is what a google image search came up with…



2) Food

Back to practical here: If you are a member of the MI, follow orders and fight and deploy where you are told, you get supplies. The eUS Congress in its infinite wisdom supports the various military branches and qualified militias with funds from the general budget specifically to direct damage where our leaders want it the most. Sure, DoD orders do that, too, but in a military unit your damage is much more tightly focused on important battles.


He really, really likes the pie.



3) Travel the world!

Sure, you don’t have to travel anymore to fight on behalf of the eUSA and her allies. But we do still deploy to various exotic locales for rest, relaxation, and resistance wars. See places you have never been before (electronically)! Meet the requirements for some of those missions! And work on your eTan!


She just fought really, really hard in a resistance war.



4) Have fun!

Thanks to the geniuses at the MI Department of Pie, every week or so there are various fun contests to be had. Among other things, we have had a Super Bowl pool, Valentine’s Day MadLibs, poetry conotest, a lottery, and caption contests. The wacky minds behind the Department of Pie bring you something to get your mind off of the drudgery of work (click) train (click) fight (click click click) eat (click) fight (click) and so on. What better way to keep yourself interested in the game than to have a little fun?


They could use a little work on their uniforms, though…


Haven’t seen enough yet? Still not convinced? Well, drop by our public channel #MI on the rizon.net server and ask around, hang out, and consider becoming a part of the wonder and gloriousness that is the Mobile Infantry. Plus, we promise we’ll find some bugs for you to shoot, even if they’re just n4n0 in a dress.




Click on the link to join us!


If you are at least 5 days old, your strength is at least 500 and your battlefield rank is Lieutenant or higher (or you can do at least 85 influence per fight barehanded) and you like pie as much as we do, you too could be a member of the Mobile Infantry!!!


If not, then get your military career started in the Training Corps!


Also, see this list of important papers you should be reading:




Respectfully submitted,
Major Spamgobbler
Press Officer
eUS Mobile Infantry