Canada = Somalia

Day 885, 15:50 • Published in Canada Canada • by Augustus Baldwin


Welcome to the "New" Canada

What has Canada become? Simple: a failed state.

Canada today is a running gun battle between various militia groups, the newsest being the unfortunately named Long Sword Rebellion, who are in no way accountable to the elected government of Canada.

A month ago I wrote an article titled "How To Stage a Coup in eRepublik." This article was a critique of the CPF's failed "coup" against then-President Chucky Norris. Chucky commented in it saying how the military would never rebel against him. Today, Chucky Norris and his "Long Sword Rebellion" (Rea😛 the military, but not the military's commander I am told, who opposes this mutiny) are perpetrating a coup, not against the CPF specifically, but against eCanadian democracy in general.

Read my old article, it is very telling of the current situation.

The Long Sword Rebellion's members claim they are just trying to help Canada. And they are. As much as Saddam Hussein was trying to help Iraq when he came to power. Or as much as Colonel Muammar al-Gaddafi was trying to help his country when he seized power in Libya. Or as much as Augusto Pinochet was trying to make his government better when he overthrew the elected Allende government in Chile.

Are you seeing a pattern here? Respectable, democratic states do not have coups. Failed states and banana republics have coups.

Respectable, democratic states do not have unaccountable militias. Somalia, Afghanistan, and Iraq have unaccountable militias.

Today, Canada apparently has both.


Canada in Distress

The traditional motto of Canada was Peace, Order and Good Government.

What is it now?

Members of the Long Sword Rebellion do not believe in this motto. They are destroying the peace, demolishing the order, and eliminating the concept of good, responsible government. And they are doing it with open support from foreign powers (Rea😛 Sweden, but who else?).

Anyone who supports the Long Sword Rebellion is not a loyal Canadian. They are guilty of sedition. There is no "arguing" around it, its a textbook case, sedition by every syllable of the word.

Now how can we, the average, loyal Canadians, save our country from the status of a failed state? How can we stop the Long Sword Rebellion and all the other militias from turning Canada into the next Somalia?

Simple: Reform the military.

Sometimes an institution becomes so intrinsically corrupted, so irrevocably flawed, so fundamentally broken, that you must take two steps backwards before you can take one forward. The fact that this new milita has formed from the very core of what was supposed to be an apolitical national institution means that half-measures and band-aid solutions are no longer acceptable. There must be a total reform. As anyone with any education on the subject knows, a liberal democratic system cannot exist with a military force not under civilian control.

Step 1- Dissolve it.

Step 2- Reconstitute it from the ground up using only loyal Canadian personnel.

Step 3- Give the various private militias that roam Canada with impunity a choice: Either pledge allegiance to the government, and have your upper command structure integrated into that of the loyal Canadian military, or have nothing to do with Canada whatsoever. The government does not need to control the militas directly, but if they want to be associated with Canada then their leaders must be beholden to the rule of law and Congress.

If the miltias do not want to be accountable then thats fine too. They can still be a militia, there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, I support private military ventures. But remember, you are a mercenary militia. Your not a Canadian militia, and your involvement in the government is as welcome as the involvement of a Romanian or Hungarian mercenary militia.


You cannot just PTO as you please!


So remember folks, today Canada is in distress. And its not because of the lulz, and its not because of the partisanship. It is because we have groups like the Long Sword Rebellion, who think they are above the law.


Is this your government?



Is this your government?



Is this your government?




Not MY government. Canada has a cancer, and its up to YOU to cut it out.