Attention New Congressmen!
Day 888, 11:47
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Published in Canada 
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by
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by Tyler F Durden
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For those new Congressmen out there, a word of warning:
FOLLOW THE RULES REGARDING CITIZENSHIP!
Each new Congressman is given the right to grant privilege of granting Canadian Citizenship to Immigration Applicants (in addition to participating in partisan politics). We have been pretty good lately in regard to Citizenship granting, but that does NOT mean we can get lazy about it. Check the Closed Door Congress thread about this.
While shoe phones may seem cool, the only ones
who can have them are spies. You cannot haz shoe phones.
Yes, wrist watch cams are way cool, but they hurt.
Do not trust anyone who wears one, and for god's sake
don't leak vital Gov't secrets while talking to someone wearing one!
"Got a smoke?" is the most common phrase
you will hear from a spy when they want to glean
national secrets from you. Smoking causes cancer,
don't do it. Nobody likes chicks who smoke and guys
just look like they're tryin to be John Wayne.
What did the Duke die of? Thats right - Cancer!
Many Congressmen just run for the 5 gold and never show up to participate in Canada's Congress. The real danger to National Security is when these meat-heads grant citizenship for the XP or on Election Day to get more votes for themselves or for their Parties.
This is not how we keep a tidy ship folks.
Not all spies will be THIS obvious.
They will speak your language with poor structure and grammar,
have Maple Leafs in their avatar and will proclaim to love beavers
and hockey as our national sport - even tho our national sport is
Lacrosse.
Canadians - I ask you to hold your Congressmen accountable and be vigilant for the sake of National Security.
WE MUST PROTECT OUR BODILY FLUIDS!
Beware the dangers rife within Fluoridation!
Oh, and try to show up for a debate now and again - it helps you to get that 5 gold again!
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Comments
I likes my waters. Down with Fluoridation and spies! They should be appropriatly roasted with a flamethrower, which conveniantly can be used to steam fluordiated water and remove those impurities! Hail flamethrower, burn spies.
Downing with all commies, spies and aliens who want to take over things they do not control now! HAHAHAHAH! Up the eUK!
"even tho our national sport is
Lacrosse."
Awwww, dang. Now you've given it away!
Also, are you trying to insinuate that the party giving 6/9 Citizenship passes on that day/page is working against Canada's best interest? Or was it the lone DAL or CNC or CPF member you're talking about? Of those 6, only 1 is now in that party. Pretty low return rates, huh?
I didn't know there was XP for each citizenship granted. Know what this means? I would have 0 more XP than I do now, if I had of known!
TFD Subs <3 beaver!
Roger
I learned something today. Lacrosse is Canada's national sport. I CAN INTO SPY
Showing up for debates never seemed to help me get more votes come election day.
I know SledDog - and you were damn good in Congress too.
And also follow the rules about following congress decorum, and not issuing lulzy impeachments.
Also don't withhold government money that isn't yours.
But the most important rule kids, is to not listen to the "advice" of stupid trolls that don't know anything about anything, and have never been to Congress before.
Take it from me, a six time Congressman, and yes re-elected 😉
deny them your essence! congressmen!
http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/comic-my-average-day-with-chaos-1325506/1/20" target="_blank">http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/comi[..]/1/20