NASA update, A Knighting, and More! (and Breaking news)

Day 1,188, 14:58 • Published in USA United Kingdom • by GLaDOS

Before I get to the meat and potatoes of this article, we have some breaking news!

Our chief enemies, who happen to be fond of golden toilets, have begun an invasion of the UK home islands. stay tuned to this paper as I will be discussing the gravity of the situation in a coming article


Hello, Citizens of the United States of Emericka. As the head Cosmonaut of the National Space Program, I feel it my duty to keep you, the people of the United States informed as to the nature of the status of our space program, and it’s mission to the moon.

Our Prototype ship, named Defense Initiative Orbiter- D.I.O I will be ready for launch in a matter of weeks. I am completely confident in my crew of highly trained, talented cosmonauts. They are the best, and the brightest. We will be the first people to the moon, we will destroy the moonenites, we will find the weapons of mass destruction, and we will plant the Stars and Bars on every single square inch of the moon’s surface!

signs of moonenite-iranian cooperation

If you haven’t already signed up to be part of erepublik history, I urge you to contact NASA administration and chief of ground control, syrup, about joining the elite team of NASA cosmonauts! For only together can we bring our country forward, into the final frontier that is space.

one of our elite cosmonauts, Colin Lantrip, getting ready for launch.

Now, In a ceremony that is long overdue, I, GLaDOS, High and Holy Prophet of Dio, Child of the sands and son of high prophet Agentchieftain, hereby bestow the honor of Knight of Dio upon St Krems the Great, slayer of Indians and Warrior of PANAM. For his high and honorable deeds which have carried the name of dio across the country and across the globe, he is truly worthy of this honor.

not only is he righteous justice, but he's also a night of Dio now :3

In other news, I happen to be running for congress in the great state of Virginia. Seeing as congressional campaign articles are quite worthless, I'm going to fill the area below with pictures of delicious cake. so, good night and good luck Emericka, and be sure to look out for my paper, who knows what I’ll write next!