Attention seeking - and how to deal with it!

Day 4,154, 20:46 • Published in Netherlands Iran • by Janty F

Greetings, citizens of Netherlands,

today, I bring you something educational. Something not written by myself, but brought over from the internet. Something, that has sadly become a topic in Netherlands lately, and we will need to deal with that one way or the other. The problem at the hand is attention seeking - a behavioral pattern, that can be dangerous to people who suffer from it, but also to people, who will support it. So read below some of the symptoms, and how to deal with them:



Attention seeking behavior is to act in a way that is likely to elicit attention, usually to elicit validation from others. People are thought to engage in both positive and negative attention seeking behavior independent of the actual benefit or harm to health. Most behavior that is motivated by attention seeking is considered to be driven by self-consciousness and thus an externalization of personality rather than internal and self-motivated behavior.

Enjoying the attention of others is socially acceptable in some situations. In some instances, however, the need for attention can lead to new difficulties and may highlight underlying, preexisting ones. However, as a tactical method, it is often used in combat, theatre (upstaging) and it is fundamental to marketing.



Below are the types of attention-seeking behavior and how it manipulates:

Fishing For Compliments
You consistently point out your achievements, however insignificant, in a way that means that those listening have to compliment you. You do this to reassure yourself and for validation.

Being Controversial On Social Media
You stir up trouble on social media and are as controversial as possible just to provoke a reaction. Some people take this to extremes, spending their days trolling celebrities, but some of us just like to share controversial articles and wait for the reactions to roll in.

Constantly Exaggerating
You embellish stories and like to make every bad situation sound far worse than it really is/was in order to gain sympathy.

…And Complaining
Hand in hand with exaggeration goes complaining. You always find something to complain about and do so constantly.

Causing Arguments
When attention is the aim, it often doesn’t matter whether that attention is positive or negative, as long as it’s there. You consistently cause arguments for no good reason, often just for the sake of receiving attention from the person or people you’re arguing with, however negative that attention might be.

Plays the victim
Used to manipulate, a person who always plays the victim will drain energy from people around them and use other’s sympathy as a barrier to the truth about them.



How to stop attention-seeking behavior
If any of the above behaviors ring a bell with someone you know, then there are steps to take in order to help them:

- One strategy used to counter various types of attention-seeking behavior is planned ignoring.
- Ignore negative behavior and reinforce positive behavior.
- Get them to focus on how their attention-seeking behavior is affecting those around them.
- Set boundaries, and stick to them.
- Pull yourself out from their dramas!



I hope some of you will remember these words of wisdom, and apply them next time you are subjected to attention seeker. I already do, and I will continue to do so, because it it slowly, but surely starting to work 😉 .

Sincerely, yours

Janty F