Hey, Remember That Guy? (Pt. 3)

Day 2,230, 05:33 • Published in Pakistan Pakistan • by Longbaugh

Three is my favorite number, so welcome to the third installment of my 137,212 part series:




Part 1
Part 2
Part 3: Dio Akira



The false god that fled the flock, Dio Akira is nonetheless a legend of the game.

A personal friend of Dio Brando’s IRL, he was the second person to ever brandish the “Dio” moniker—after Dio himself. But, despite his namesake, he was no deity.

He neither conjured nor conquered sandworms. He was never "of the sand". He merely moved to a vulnerable country and exerted his will. It was a will that commanded great warriors who were eveready to answer his call and command—the likes of Colinar, Donovan Thomas, and Dio Maksas.

It was a will that accumulated its own flock of spiritual separatists who claimed to serve Dio Brando, but only ever really served Dio Akira’s Theocracy.

Theocracy, as any Theocrat from the ages would tell you, was about war and gold. It was the strongest branch of Dioism in terms of might and wealth, though it was not the first. Yusuphist Dioism—an orthodox denomination that followed the death of Abdul Yusuf—was the first branch. It was followed by a brief and particularly pathetic offshoot that adopted the “teachings” of Phaedrus Lidox (mostly hairstyling tips).

Then came Theocracy, and Dio Akira (who was then by far the richest player in the game) migrated his people to Switzerland, where they established a second "Empire of Dio" based on war... and gold.

I know of only a handful of Theocrats outside of Italy that are still alive, though none of them represent the faith anymore.

As it should be.

He was a master commander, but Dio Akira was no god—he sure as hell had a problem with my very public insistence on the matter. Nonetheless, the man successfully paraded himself as more than just a man and made a ton of gold... and he is a legend of the game for doing so.

Frankly, I always thought he was a prissy prick.

Remember that guy?