Why You REALLY Do Not Need to Panic

Day 1,038, 12:51 • Published in Japan Japan • by Akki


Note: I’m not going to commercialize myself for votes for congress election here, just because it’s just stupid.


Why You REALLY Do Not Need to Panic – A Modest Proposal


There are many talks about PTO, some claiming it is nonexistent. This time, the PTO had come from eIndonesia, not from Kita Ikki or any other politically challenged people from the past who ran for the destruction of Japanese Society. In the past, Japan had not been PTOed to the point that our nation was taken over. Yet, there were times where Japan had to rely on foreigners who immigrated to Japan to run a society. There were times where we combated this also. This time, it is different. I, like many others before me, have decided to put my head into the sand and pretend that this PTO doesn’t exist. Instead I decided to come up with ultimate solutions for eJapan to combat future chances of nonexistent PTO and how we would further combat this issue to help prevent eJapan from going into foreign hands.

Now with humility, I present my modest proposals against PTO. I decided to use very great words from others who have said this much better as my basic points. Rather than to come up with new ideas, I have decided to use their ideas and further explore it.


Point Number 1: Getting bored and moving away (or quitting) is a pattern that repeats itself in eJapan.

This is the true reason why Japan will never need to worry about PTO threats. Japan is boring and no one smart will ever stay here for long. This is repeating pattern within eJapan. This is the true reason why Japan needs no such thing as Anti-PTO. However, even though people get bored and move away after period of some times, that doesn’t change the fact that Japan is PTOed for a short time. However, I have come up with solution for this as well.

The ultimate solution to this problem of harmful people that comes to Japan not getting bored fast enough is Simple. We will make eJapan inhabitable ourselves so the foreigners will have no reason to come to eJapan. First, we will make minimum wages so high that any smart business owners wishing to take advantage of eJapan will not be able to survive. We will tank our monetary market too so that there is no stability in monetary market, which will drive out any people wishing to tamper with eJapan and trade with us. Next, we will raise our taxes to the extremes: high as we can put it. No one sensible will ever start business in such a tax high environment. No foreigners will ever think about coming to this nation and try to do anything if this land is so inhabitable. Japanese citizens may be affected by this as well and get bored and quit, but hey, eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE right?


Point Number 2: Only thing that is lucrative to PTOers are eJapan’s High Grain.

Next thing that we have to worry about is eJapan’s High Grain. This may be the real reason why PTOers will want to takeover eJapan. So I have solution to fix that too. We will invite some nation to take over eJapan’s high grain region so it will be of no concerns for eJapan. No PTOers wishing to access high grain will ever think about putting their feet into the eJapan if we have no high grain to begin with. The best solution however, will be to beg admins to remove any resource from eJapan so we can’t do anything and we will be North Korea of erepublik (I think we will even have the honor of being the first nation to have our natural resource removed too). Then, we will have no resources so no smart citizens will ever set their foot in here. Our citizens may be affected, but hey, eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE right?


Point Number 3: Only reason eJapan will be PTOed is because of Kyushu Bridge.

Third thing on our list that we have to take care of so that eJapan will never be PTOed is the Kyushu Bridge. This is hard question to solve because eJapan is located in strategic location. We bridge North America and Asia. For this, I have come up with unique Ideas to solve this. Instead of holding onto Kyushu, my idea, inspired by others, is to just simply give away Kyushu. Give it to other nations and eJapan will never have to worry about Kyushu problem again. Sure, eJapan will lose our valuable region but hey, eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE right?


Point Number 4: In reality, the sky is not falling; Chicken Little was mistaken.

For this, I kindly turn your attention to http://www.erepublik.com/en/propose-congressman/esos-brigade-2425/0

Let’s see…. Cherberus, Schicksalstag, Shisio makoto, Near12, Kamen Rider Rx, No Fear 101, Myrrh-nee, Bahadur Binu, Eiji Date, GreatBass, KhomKhomChi, Princess Tokyo, Ken Nakayama…. And the list will probably increase. But once again, I am just panicking and there is no reason to do this. Chicken Little was mistaken. Like Kita said, they are no PTO; they are just legitimate Japanese citizens.


Point Number 5: eJapan is already PTOed by eUSA anyways.

This is great point someone came up with. However, the argument here is still futile because eJapan IS *STILL* HERE. There is no such thing as PTO if eJapan is still here. There are some immigrants from eUSA that have made eJapan their home but I think my solutions from Point Number 1 of making eJapan inhabitable will solve this issue. To stop this from happening in the future, we will simply say F@ck-off to USA and any other countries that may have citizens interested in eJapan for that matter. That should do the trick.




Concluding Remarks: eJapan IS *STILL* HERE and eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE!

No matter how low we go, no matter how many citizens eJapan looses, The main focus of this article is that eJapan IS *STILL* HERE and eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE. No matter if there is only one citizen left in this nation, no matter if Nuclear Bomb hits eJapan and we looses all our citizens, No matter if admins reset this game, eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE. Thus, there is no reason for anyone in eJapan to panic since eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE. Sure, we may be the Sahara desert or North Korea of erepublik, eJapan will exists and we will be fine.


Since eJapan WILL *STILL* BE HERE even if we do nothing, let’s all stick our head under the sand and pretend nothing bad is happening.


Future of eJapan is very bright indeed.



Special thanks to Kita Ikki and Shim Myeong-eun for the inspiration.



tl;dr? the idea of "eJapan is *still* here and eJapan will *still* be here" just doesn't work.