Why Elect TurtleShroom to Congress?

Day 1,366, 12:00 • Published in North Korea Croatia • by TurtleShroom

Hello! If you're reading this, then it means that we will re-elect our Congressmen for the Democratic Peoples' Republic of North Korea within a matter of days.
I am honored to note that I snagged myself a seat of power in the past, thanks to the endorsement of Captain Communism and the diligence of those who thought I was a good fit.

However, I performed a LOT of absolute stupidity in my term of office. As you know, I proposed Serbia as a Natural Enemy and suggested raising the Minimum Wage to thirty KPWs. I did not provide a proper discussion forum and my proposals were soundly, and rightly, eliminated.

That may make you wonder, then: why in the world should you re-elect TurtleShroom?
Well, I'll tell you.


* TurtleShroom met every campaign promise he made and fulfilled his word to the letter. I promised a Minimum Wage bill and delivered. I promised a Gift of Citizenship and delivered. -and now, I promised to provide a discussion for everything I do as a Congressman. Now, look here what I'm doing! See? I deliver!


* TurtleShroom is officially endorsed by Captain Communism, AKA Chuck Norris. Captain Communism is an E-Republik master and veteran. He has won the Presidency of his country at least once and has a full command of the game. If he endorses someone, they're a good candidate. I was endorsed. TURTLESHROOM IS CHUCK NORRIS APPROVED.

* TurtleShroom is incorruptible. You can not bribe me to do your bidding. I will only do your bidding if I agree with you. I only support special interests that I agree with. I was bribed by three people, and was offered handesome gifts for Citizenship. Every time, I refused. TurtleShroom does not accept bribes.

* TurtleShroom puts North Korea first. No legislating for the favor of others, heck no!

* TurtleShroom has been a North Korean Citizen from day one. He has never, and will never, change his citizenship without express approval and in an extenuating circumstance.

* TurtleShroom is an active member of Congress and votes on every bill that comes before him. Unlike some Congressmen, TurtleShroom will actively do his job. I did not miss even a SINGLE proposal.

* TurtleShroom will create a discussion page for EVERY proposal he makes. I will NEVER make the mistake of my last mandate again, EVER. PERIOD. EVER EVER EVER.



So remember: when you want to know who is the best man for Congress, look to TurtleShroom.

VOTE TURTLESHROOM FOR NORTH KOREAN CONGRESS!