WAR UPDATE: Confused Nations Attack Everyone

Day 669, 22:10 Published in USA USA by Hari Michaelson
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lolPEACE

-Editor-on-the-Edge-
Hari Michaelson
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56 new offensives launched by 23 nations, Indonesia discovers/attacks the Artctic, confused Germans declare war on selves

It was pandemonium on the world stage today, as confused leaders from around the world discarded all pre-concieved notions regarding understanding of the eRepublik war module, choosing to instead press the attack button with a fervor and intensity described by onlookers as "totally fucking insane".

"It was crazy. Gaius, Parter, all of them. They just got this glossed over look in their eyes and started clicking attack. It was....it was terrifying"

The intricate and oftentimes self-contradictory nature of eRepublik's war module, while normally only midly frutstrating, was today the source of a situation which, when combined with PEACE's growing desperation on the North American continent, resulted in a dizzying blur of attacks, retreats, counter-attacks, feints, feint attacks, counter-retreats, and countering-retreat feints. Those who witnessed the events occur are reportedly being treated for symptoms most commonly associated with shock, visual-trauma induced blindness, and spontaneous onset insanity.

When asked for commentary on eRepublik's war module, specifically regarding an explanation of the module's inner workings, the admin representative responded with a shrill hiss and a demand for a blood sacrifice before departing upon mere mortals the horrible, dark knowledge of The Ancients. The representative then proceeded to rip the souls from the very bodies of those around him.


Picture😛 Admin head Alexis Bonte

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