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http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/vorbe-de-duh-reeditare--2148966/1/20



Dumnezeu a dat femeilor trei calitati: frumusete, intelepciune, fidelitate; punand conditia ca nici o femeie sa nu le aibe pe toate trei!
(God gave women three qualities : beauty, wisdom, faithfullness; He also had one condition : no woman should have all three qualities)

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Cine se scoala de dimineata, oboseste pan’la pranz.
(The one who wakes up early in the morning gets tired by noon)

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Esti sanatos ? Vesel ? Bine dispus ? Stai linistit! Toate astea o sa treaca!
(Are you healthy ? Are you joyful? In a good mood? Relax! All these will go away!)

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Cine-i harnic si munceste are ce manca; cine-i lenes si chiuleste are si ce bea.
(The one who's hard worker gets what to eat. The one who's lazy gets what to drink, too)

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Vine omu’
Sta oleaca
Mai discuta
Dar si pleaca!
(One is coming, He stays a while, He chats a while... But he's leaving, too)

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Nu sunt superstitioasa, ca aduce ghinion!
(I'm not superstitious, that brings bad fortune)

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Fiecare barbat are nevoie de o amanta! Nevasta crede ca el e la amanta, amanta crede ca e la nevasta, si asa, el poate sa sada linistit in biblioteca sa citeasca!
(Each man needs a mistress! His wife believes that he's at the mistress, the mistress believes that he's with his wife. Thus, the man can sit relaxed in the library to read...)

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Daca vine Muntele la tine si nu te cheama Mahomed, mai bine fugi: sigur e alunecare de teren!
(If the mountain comes to you and your name is not Mohammed, you better run: it's a land slide!)

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Nu te enerva! Ia un ciocan mai mare!
(Do not get mad ! Get a bigger hammer!)

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Nu bea la volan! Te poti lovi de ceva si se varsa bautura.
(Don't drink while driving! You could hit something and spill the drink)

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Da-i unui om un peste si el va avea hrana pentru o zi; invata-l sa pescuiasca si el va sta pe marginea lacului si va bea bere toata ziua.
(Give a man a fish and he'll have food for one day. Teach him to fish and he'll stay by the lake drinking beer all day long)

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A avea constiinta curata inseamna a avea memorie proasta.
(Having a clean consciousness means having a bad memory)

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Prostul rade de trei ori : o data cand rad ceilalti, o data cand intelege gluma si inca o data cand isi da seama ca rasese fara sa inteleaga.
(The fool laughs three times: once when everybody else is laughing; once when he finally understands the joke; and once when he realizes that he laughed without understanding the joke)

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Sa nu te certi niciodata cu un prost! Ceilalti au toate sansele sa nu observe diferenta!
(Do not argue with a fool ! It's most likely that the others do not see the difference between you and the fool!)

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Inteligenta ma urmareste....dar eu sunt mai rapida decat ea.
(Inteligence is folowing me... but i'm faster!)

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Daca într-o zi te simti inutil si deprimat, consoleaza-te cu gândul ca odata ai fost spermatozoidul cel mai rapid dintre toti.
(If one day you feel useless and down, remember that one day, you were the fastest of all spermatozoon)

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Unii barbati isi iubesc asa de mult femeile lor incat, pentru a nu le uza, se folosesc de femeile altora.
(Some men love their women so much and because they do not want to wear them down, they use someone's (other) women)

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Daca femeia ar fi buna, si Dumnezeu ar avea una.
(If woman was good, God would have one, too)

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Dimineatza nu mananc pt ca ma gandesc la tine, la pranz nu mananc pt ca ma gandesc la tine, seara nu dorm pt ca mi-e foame!
(In the morning i don't eat because i think of you; at noon i don't eat because i think of you; in the evening i don't sleep because i'm hungry)

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Toti iti vor binele, asa ca nu ii lasa sa ti-l ia!
(Everybody else wants your good, so don't let them get it from you)

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A gresi este omeneste. A da vina pe altul este si mai omeneste.
(Being wrong is humanly normal. Blaming somebody else is even more humanly normal)

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Prostia inseamna sa faci acelasi lucru in mod repetat, asteptand rezultate diferite.
(Stupidity means to make the same thing more than once, but expecting different results)

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Sa nu contrazici niciodata o femeie! Sa astepti putin, ca o face ea singura!
(Do not ever contradict a woman. Wait a while, she will contradict herself !)

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E mai bine sa taci si sa dai impresia ca esti prost, decat sa vorbesti si sa inlaturi orice dubiu!
(It's better to shut up and give the impression that you are stupid, rather than speak out and make it clear that you are stupid!)

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Ca sa intelegi ca esti prost trebuie sa iti mearga mintea.
(To understand that you are stupid you have to be wise)

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Nu este important sa castigi! Este important sa-l faci pe celalalt sa piarda.
(It's not important to win! It's important to make the other one lose.)