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Hello everyone a will write some jokes and facts about Chuck Norris and i am sure that you will like it. 🙂

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1.Chuck Norris donated his heart to a hospital.....twice.

2.When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris

3.Chuck Norris won American Idol using only sign language

4.Chuck Norris doesn't lie. Whatever he says simply becomes the truth.

5.Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic

6.Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.

7.Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

8.Once the cop pulled over Chuck Norris....the cop was lucky to leave with a warning.

9.Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards

10.Chuck Norris can hear you screaming in the space.

11.There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

12.Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.

13.Did you know Chuck Norris had a role in Star Wars......he was the force.

14.If you rate this 5 roundhouse kicks, then Chuck Norris WILL roundhouse kick Justin Bieber's ass.

15.Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.

16.When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.

17.Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.

18.Chuck Norris does not have a middle name, nobody gets between Chuck Norris.

19.Chuck Norris grew a beard at the age of eighteen. Seconds.

20.Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"

21.Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.

22.When Sony tried to make a game about Chuck Norris the Playstation network crashed

23.Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter

24.Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke....that truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

25.Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

26.Chuck Norris doesn't lick postage stamps, he stares at them until they wet themselves.

27.Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the sh*t out of it

28.Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes

29.Chuck Norris is the only person that can kick you in the back of your face

30.Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

31.When the president pushes the big red button Chuck Norris's cell phone rings

32.Chuck Norris can speak Brail, and hear Sign Language.

33.Chuck Norris doesn't brag. It's the truth.

34.Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

35.Chuck Norris can write a Dictionary by slamming his face into the keyboard.

36.Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience

37.Chuck Norris can speak French in Russian.

38.Chuck Norris Talks About himself in the fourth Person.

39.Chuck Norris does'nt turn the lights on, he turns the dark out.

40.Chuck Norris gets the Sunday papers on Thursday

41.Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

42.Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicks are the 2nd leading cause of death world wide after heart attacks, most of which were caused by fear of a roundhouse kic

43.Chuck Norris couldn't go to school because he was considered a weapon.

44.Chuck Norris doesn't sweat. He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.

45.Never, ever name a hurricane 'Chuck Norris'.

46.Chuck Norris once round-house kicked a horse in the chin... its desendants are now known as the girraffe

47.Chuck Norris made all the colours of the rainbow, except pink: Tom Cruise made pink.

48.When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

49.Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless telephone

50.When life gave Chuck Norris lemons, he made lemonade, a 9 inch hunting knife, an AK-47, and a playpen for his pet scorpion.