This article started out being 4,500+ words, but I know how you all hate to read

Day 953, 10:35 • Published in USA USA • by Joey Jackson


I am publishing this, my final article, not because I'm an attention seeking whore looking for some poor SOBs to try and convince me to stay, but as a goodbye to people I have befriended during my eLife and spew a little crap about what I did in my eRep time.

Businessman
I owned Dik-in-a-Box (gifts), Luv Shack (houses), Big Bald Bazookas (weaps). Running these companies were the bane of my existence. They have all been downgraded or sold, so don't ask for me to give them to you.

Rhode Island Bikini Watch
This newspaper was worthless and uninformative (the only exception: Here). I basically exploited the fact the key demographic of this game are 14-18 yr old boys and shamelessly posted countless babes in bikinis for votes, then I got bored of that.

Life as a soldier
I skipped through the TC (because I wasn't a total boob) and signed up with the Army. Very quickly I was invited to join the elite Army Rangers unit. They pretty much kick ass.

Steroids, Lana & Napoleon
I payed lots of hard earned gold on that money-thieving trollop and her hooker dwarf comrade.

Game Mod.
One day, I thought to myself, "how could I give back to eRepublik?" (why would anyone think that). Actually, I just wanted to be a ban-hammer swinging mothersucker, so I applied to become a game mod. After filling out several rigorous, well thought out questionnaires I was approved (along with dozens of prepubescent ban-hammer happy twats. Unfortunately, I quickly realized being a game mod wasn't all it was cracked up to be. After going through countless tickets, I never actually banned anyone. I just found countless dumb asses complaining about extraneous shit. Citizen "x" would bitch about Citizen "y" having "an offensive avatar" or Citizen "z" would claim Citizen "a" published a vulgar article simply because "z" was butt-hurt about loosing a battle to "a"'s country. I found it as painful as that d-bag at work who laughs at situations that aren't really funny, as if they heard the best joke ever.

I did dish out a few warnings, for blatant pornography.

[Insert more worthless filler here]

Some cool fgts I met, admired their articles, stalked from a distance
The Man, the Mullet, the Legend . . . Jack Flufferton
Maj. Gen. bombonato
Astra Kat G (for her articles/redhead babes)
Gráinne Ní Mháille (always shouts cool tunes)
Ajay the Hut (for being a cartoon character for all of us to laugh at)
some other people I can't remember
and my RL friend, Jon Malcom
Thanks for making this game fun.

To conclude: eRep has been like a cruel bitch mother to me.
So long fgts.
























































Gordie Howe Career Statistics
Regular Season Playoffs
Season Team . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Lge . . . .GP G A Pts PIM GP G A Pts PIM
1945-46 Omaha Knights . . . . USHL . . . 51 22 26 48 53 6 2 1 3 15
1946-47 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL. . . . 58 7 15 22 52 5 0 0 0 18
1947-48 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .60 16 28 44 63 10 1 1 2 11
1948-49 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . 40 12 25 37 57 11 8 3 11 19
1949-50 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 35 33 68 69 1 0 0 0 7
1950-51 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . 70 43 43 86 74 6 4 3 7 4
1951-52 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . 70 47 39 86 78 8 2 5 7 2
1952-53 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 49 46 95 57 6 2 5 7 2
1953-54 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 33 48 81 109 12 4 5 9 31
1954-55 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .64 29 33 62 68 11 9 11 20 24
1955-56 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 38 41 79 100 10 3 9 12 8
1956-57 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 44 45 89 72 5 2 5 7 6
1957-58 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .64 33 44 77 40 4 1 1 2 0
1958-59 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 32 46 78 57 -- -- -- -- --
1959-60 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 28 45 73 46 6 1 5 6 4
1960-61 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .64 23 49 72 30 11 4 11 15 10
1961-62 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 33 44 77 54 -- -- -- -- --
1962-63 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 38 48 86 100 11 7 9 16 22
1963-64 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .69 26 47 73 70 14 9 10 19 16
1964-65 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 29 47 76 104 7 4 2 6 20
1965-66 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .70 29 46 75 83 12 4 6 10 12
1966-67 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .69 25 40 65 53 -- -- -- -- --
1967-68 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .74 39 43 82 53 -- -- -- -- --
1968-69 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .76 44 59 103 58 -- -- -- -- --
1969-70 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .76 31 40 71 58 4 2 0 2 2
1970-71 Detroit Red Wings . . .NHL . . . .63 23 29 52 38 -- -- -- -- --
1971-72 Did Not Play
1972-73 Did Not Play
1973-74 Houston Aeros WHA 70 31 69 100 46 13 3 14 17 34
1974-75 Houston Aeros WHA 75 34 65 99 84 13 8 12 20 20
1975-76 Houston Aeros WHA 78 32 70 102 76 17 4 8 12 31
1976-77 Houston Aeros WHA 62 24 44 68 57 11 5 3 8 11
1977-78 N.E. Whalers WHA 76 34 62 96 85 14 5 5 10 15
1978-79 N.E. Whalers WHA 58 19 24 43 51 10 3 1 4 4
1979-80 Hartford Whalers NHL 80 15 26 41 42 3 1 1 2 2
1997-98 Detroit Vipers IHL 1 0 0 0 0 -- -- -- -- --

GP G A Pts PIM GP G A Pts PIM
WHA Totals 419 174 334 508 399 78 28 43 71 115
NHL Totals 1767 801 1049 1850 1685 157 68 92 160 220