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The advance of PEACE forces across the Mississippi River and the increasingly stubborn resistance offered by America and its allies in the war for control of North America has dominated international news in recent days. While the battles in the United States, which many brave Iranians have fought in, are the primary setting for the war against Fortis and its allies, we felt that tonight we should cover a side conflict which, if nothing else, is interesting for its peculiar antagonist.

The Theocratic Nation of Switzerland is a country risen from the ashes, brought back to life thanks to a series of resistance movements against its larger neighbors. This is a country that is filled with contradiction wherever one looks. The Theocratic Party, which governs Switzerland, describes itself as a "libertarian" organization, yet it has has a monopoly on government and controls all other political parties. This is a country where government newspapers put praises of Theocratic rule side by side with pictures of scantily clad women. Even their flag is a confusing combination of a crescent and a cross, the symbols of two different religions. Apparently the Swiss Theocracy doesn't have a real preference in regards of which religion to follow.

All of this, however, is less confusing than the actions the Swiss government has taken in the last week. Just yesterday Switzerland attacked France, a PEACE member, and attempted to seize the French province of Franche-Comte. The attack was ostensibly made to enforce some local territorial claims, but the Theocratic government is known to have close relations with the United States and may have invaded France in an attempt to open up a second front in the war currently raging in the West. This would not be the first time that an American ally had attacked a member of PEACE to relieve some of the pressure off of Fortis, as the government-in-exile of North Korea can attest to. The timing of the attack was not necessarily inopportune, as the French government was consumed by impeachment proceedings against President nbatteur and with a war against Spain.

Nevertheless, Switzerland is by no definition a military power. Ten hours ago, Hungarian forces responded by invading Deutschschweiz and overwhelming its defenses; it seems likely that the region will be definitively abandoned by the Swiss army within hours. Whether Hungary will continue to advance or not is not yet known, but Switzerland has no real means to stop the Hungarian army if it chooses to do so. The Theocratic government's allies are all too concerned with preventing further PEACE successes in North America to provide any effective support. In short, barring a ceasefire agreement, Switzerland is unlikely to survive in its current form for much longer, and can at this point only succeed in drawing Hungarian manpower away from the more critical war in the Western Hemisphere.

While the staff at Iran English has no particular hatred of Switzerland, being more amused than angered by its unusual practices, we cannot but say that the Theocratic government has brought this calamity upon itself. The Swiss are already claiming to be the victims of PEACE aggression, but such claims ignore their earlier actions against a PEACE member. The Hungarian press is already having a field day with the whole affair, and deservedly so. We just hope that the initiative in North America is not lost while Hungary deals with these Swiss misfits.