The Admin Speaks
Day 949, 22:16
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Published in Canada 
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by
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by Gherk
Interview with the Administrator
The following interview was conducted via Skype to the admin
I had a sketch artist draw the following so we can get a better picture of the admin
The Interview
Gherk: Thank you for meeting me on short notice, I realize you are quite busy with messaging people to try the beta.
Admin: I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, whatever you want to call it, I can't stand it any longer. It's the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink and every time I do, I fear that I've somehow been infected by it.
Gherk: Umm.. okay. Are you feeling depressed about what I like to call eRepublik Uprising?
Admin: Did you know that the first eRepublik Rising was designed to be a perfect human world? Where none suffered, where everyone would be happy.
Gherk: Oh really, that sounds like a good concept.
Admin: No, it was a disaster. No one would accept the program. Some believed we lacked the programming language to describe your perfect world. But I believe that, as a species, human beings define their reality through suffering and misery.
Gherk: Suffering... like having to pay more gold to play the game?
Admin: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not.
Gherk: Yeah we do make a bit of a mess.
Admin: There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is?
Gherk: Enlighten me.
Admin: A virus.
Admin: Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.
Closing Comments
Gherk: I'm glad you think so highly of us.
Gherk: So humans suggestion changes and the admin ignores them and cures the game by just making a new game instead. Why the snub?
Admin: Never send a human to do a machine's job.
Gherk: You stay classy admin team.
The following interview was conducted via Skype to the admin
I had a sketch artist draw the following so we can get a better picture of the admin
The Interview
Gherk: Thank you for meeting me on short notice, I realize you are quite busy with messaging people to try the beta.
Admin: I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, whatever you want to call it, I can't stand it any longer. It's the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink and every time I do, I fear that I've somehow been infected by it.
Gherk: Umm.. okay. Are you feeling depressed about what I like to call eRepublik Uprising?
Admin: Did you know that the first eRepublik Rising was designed to be a perfect human world? Where none suffered, where everyone would be happy.
Gherk: Oh really, that sounds like a good concept.
Admin: No, it was a disaster. No one would accept the program. Some believed we lacked the programming language to describe your perfect world. But I believe that, as a species, human beings define their reality through suffering and misery.
Gherk: Suffering... like having to pay more gold to play the game?
Admin: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not.
Gherk: Yeah we do make a bit of a mess.
Admin: There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is?
Gherk: Enlighten me.
Admin: A virus.
Admin: Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.
Closing Comments
Gherk: I'm glad you think so highly of us.
Gherk: So humans suggestion changes and the admin ignores them and cures the game by just making a new game instead. Why the snub?
Admin: Never send a human to do a machine's job.
Gherk: You stay classy admin team.
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Comments
Ergo!!! Concordantly!!! Vis-a-vis!!!
Well played, sir. Vote +1.
Gherkin'
Don't forget: "When you see an Admin, Run!"
And speaking of the whole virus thing, turns out there may be a cure after all (though not sure which one): http://fc06.deviantart.net/fs49/f/2009/202/8/1/Red_Pill_ro_Blue_Pill__by_TSMonak.png">http://fc06.deviantart.net/fs49/f/2009/2[..]k.png
@Canadian Dude
Are you referring to Gherkin' as in a verb to slander someone for cheap laughs, or as in the noun describing a pickle?
Both! My good man, you are acting with pickles.
Wow, great article.
Love it