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Issue 02 ▪ Volume I ▪ Est. July 29, 2009

Welcome to the second issue of the The Big Patootie. Once again, we eAmericans find ourselves in desperate times. With PEACE all around us some might have wondered what they are thinking and what they really want. Who better to ask than the Supreme Commander of PEACE himself, Feherlofia Koppany. In this week’s interview we’ll do just that!




This issue’s Cutie Patootie was Miss Lucy Pinder but apparently she was showing off more of her 'sweet liberty' than was allowed by the man. Instead, for your viewing pleasure... some random patootie on the beach! (There are still two nipples on display if you look hard enough. Hint: They aren't on the girl.)



Home Front
We’d like to spend a little time discussing something that each eAmerican can do to help the war effort. Take a moment and think about the basics of the game. You buy commodities to live and support your country—food and weapons—and then you make money and fight. Simple, right?

Wrong. Let’s look a little closer at a very common situation happening thousands of times a day in the eUSA right now. You click on market and select Food. You select the cheapest available (for the quality you can afford) at the top of the page and purchase a few days worth. But who are you buying it from?

You might be surprised at how often it is a foreign and hostile player. Hungarians and Indonesians are flooding our markets with products, taking our money, and buying weapons to attack another state. That’s right, friend, buying from players of hostile countries is knocking down our walls.

So stop. Don’t just look for the lowest price at the top of the page. Look for the nationality of the company and the citizenship of the player that is running it. Yes, you might have to sift through five or ten companies until you find an American but that American company owner is buying weapons to defend eAmerica and paying employees who are doing the same.

Be a patriot. Buy American.

International

Does anyone remember seeing this ad? He’s essentially begging for money for some undisclosed purpose. We here at the Patootie find it difficult to believe that this guy would even break even over his advertisement costs but there is something more sinister here. Let’s look at who posted this ad, shall we?


Hmm… Says here that he is a Hungarian General.

This could mean two things. He could be trying to con well-intentioned wealthy eAmericans from their USD and Gold or he is truly suffering from economic hardship. Let’s hope that it is the later. If this Hungarian soldier is broke that means he has already blown his load on the war.

Nice.


Politics
There was another bid to put a Q5 Hospital outside of our stronghold states of New Jersey, Florida, and California. Some would argue that the residents there need to be able to fight properly and can’t without the expensive addition of this infrastructure. But this is a backwards way of approaching the issue.

The eUnited States has a huge number of states but only three matter from a strategic point of view: the stronghold states. These are choke points that must be breached if a direct invasion is to be made by a foreign power. This arrangement is why it was essential for PEACE to befriend the eUK and attack Canada first. Once our “back door” was breached it got ugly. But this current ugliness does not mean that we should arm all of eAmerica or even some of the populist states that are not of strategic importance.

What it means is that everyone that wants to fight and support their country should relocate out of states that may become compromised in the short term and defend the three that will make or break us. California has already fallen. Would it have done so if we had more patriots taking up wartime residence in a stronghold state? No, it would still be strong and holding back the hordes.

If you haven’t already done so, move to New Jersey or Florida. Anything else is ignorant and unpatriotic.



The Interview: Feherlofia Koppany
Feherlofia Koppany, the Supreme Commander of PEACE, was gracious enough to give The Big Patootie an interview last Thursday. Mr. Koppany is very involved with eRepublik, having served as President of Hungary for two terms and being responsible for reopening the Eastern front when Romania advanced in Asia. He meets monthly with his local PEACE compatriots to enjoy the game and discuss its future.


The Leader of PEACE Makes War

Do you have any real life animosity towards the US or is the invasion just part of the game fun?
No I haven't any IRL problem with the USA. I was there severeal times, for example in NYC and LA and I really enjoyed it. eRepublik is a game, a strategy game for me and I'm playing according to this. 🙂

What are your aspirations in the eUSA as the Supreme Commander of PEACE?
My main objective is to get fun and success for the people of PEACE. This is a long war and I'm sure, that we are just in the beginning of it. Now the PEACE has the military upper hand, but who knows, next week maybe you will kick out the PEACE from North-America.

With your recent successes in the eUSA campaign (California in particular) and some of the disappointments abroad (such as Italy’s PTO and the eUK’s lack of assistance with Thailand), do you feel that your goals can be easily/quickly met?
Besides fun, of course we have some strategic goals too. We achieved many of these, now we have to stabilize the situation. I'm very sad about Italy, but as always, PEACE will find the solution for this case. This can be diplomatical or violent, like in North-Korea.

What is your overall grade (A+ through F-) of PEACE and FORTIS during this campaign so far and why?
My grade to PEACE is A. Excellent communication and cooperation between the members, fast reaction to strategic puzzles. My grade to Fortis is E. Fortis has some good move on strategy, but reactions are slow and desultory. Its clear that the military leaders in eUS are not competent and they don't know the fine strategic elements of the game.

If you were the eAmerican president, with the eUS’s best interests in mind, what would you change about how things are done politically and militarily in the eUS and why?
Fortis seems abandoned by its allies, Romania cares about Ukraine, Poland issued 650k DEM from 3200 Gold in the day of California, which is a big problem. PEACE punishes hard every turbulance in her plans (see North-Korea) and this keeps away the smaller coutries. If any country will attack PEACE with blocking purpose, I can assure them that they will follow the example of NK.

Now in the place of the eUSA president I would make any effort to avoid further losses (in some days Kansas and Texas can fall too) and I would reorganize the whole army and strategic leadership. I think it would be reasonable to reconsider the relations with the so called eUSA allies.

Following the interview, Koppany and I continued the discussion, exchanging ideas about eAmerican policies and the recent banning of Richard Harrison. We found him to be personable and a man of conviction.

Exalted
Executive Editor