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Pre-Election Day Article
Welcome to your newest edition of Bowling for News by your favorite reclusive writer, and part time politician. Theatrics over, this really has been a weird time for me personally in eRep. I have only been able to get on infrequently so that the politics and social aspects of eSwitzerland seem to have passed me by. I used to know almost every name in the three existing parties. Now there are five and I only know a handful out of people out of my own party. As for politics now, I don’t know why I even bother to try to understand them. There are those who love MG, and then those who hate him. Those who think we should join TEDEN, and those who believe our policy of neutrality has served us well over the years. I have heard so many arguments and counter arguments that sometimes I just want to throw my hand s up in the air and give up. Only one thing keeps me sane in this fictitious, imaginary world. Writing the news. If I ever don’t understand anything, I can mention it at some time in my article and it will likely be answered in the comments in one or two days.I don't have anything to ask you but, because I have been doing this for way to long I have decided to add another part to my article. At the end of this edition, I will be adding a sort of predictions section where I will make completely inaccurate forecasts about wars that are incalculable. Just make sure on one thing, Enjoy.

Austria

When I did my last article forever ago, Italy had control over a small section of Northeast Austria. Now though Italy is gone, in their place Slovakia has stepped in. I’d like to think of them as Slovenia’s smaller, awkward, little sister, though I will undoubtedly get some nasty hate mail from that country for that comment. Austria looks to be okay with this seeing as I have yet to notice an attack or resistance war from either side, but it easily possible for a major war to slip by under my watch. Just yesterday I was informed that Phoenix is dead and that ONE and TEDEN are the alliances fighting right now.

Belgium

Normally I just skip this part even if Belgium actually has done something normally it is just about as interesting as watching C-Span. However, this time, this time…nothing is different.

France

Just looking at France the comeback TEDEN has made is evident. Back about six months ago France was completely PTO’ed. Currently it is in a much nicer situation, it has most of its core regions back, and it has portions of southern England to go along with it. If there is one reason, just one reason I would consider joining TEDEN because of it would be this, yet there are still some major arguments against so I will leave that decision up to the major, well, decision makers.

Germany

Germany has never been a major player in this war, which is kind of odd, because if there was a war in Europe in real life today they would probably be one of the largest. What make all of this even odder is that there isn’t really a lack of citizens in Germany. They could potentially really make difference in the conflict but, they have the unfortunate problem of being smack in the center of Europe so that they will be run over by both sides in order to get to the other one. Kind of like Switzerland in a way except that the county controlling us isn’t using us as a bridge but more of as a farm where sugar and other superfluous goods can be made. Good news from Germany despite all of these previous problems, a section of Germany has been reclaimed for the home team. Located on the west side near stuporous Belgium and the now protected Netherlands, the area regained by Germany is large enough for me believe that it may just stay on the map another day. Their unfortunate northern neighbor, Denmark has been taken over by Germany for indiscernible reason though I suspect it is to get back at their prior PTO’er Sweden.

Italy

Italy is much like Germany in a lot of ways. They are in the middle of a major path way back and forth so they are always have almost no control over their original territories, The only difference is that Italy’s PTO’ers are always switching. One moment it’s Macedonia the next it’s Serbia, after that it’s Montenegro, throw into the mix Slovenia and you have a flush. Now the same thing that happened to Germany is happening to Italy. They are getting there regions back. The entire southern part of the country is in Italy’s possession. Let’s help them push northwards to cut off Slovenia from us so we may take back all of our regions. I know this is wishful thinking but sometimes I chose to indulge in some overly optimistic hopes just for the fun of it.

Ireland

Ireland has all of their regions back and has held them for some time whilst the UK has floundered under TEDEN occupation. Canada and France have taken all of the British territory except for Northern Ireland which seems to be their most precious territory even now when it isn’t the only region being attacked. Ireland better hope that EDEN remains strong in its major counter offensive.

Netherlands

Besides the gaining back of all of their regions there is nothing to report from Amsterdam.

Portugal

Why is it that Portugal and Venezuela are continually fighting? Does a small island in the middle of the Atlantic really have that much value? Do they have some sort of grudge against each other that can only be sated by blood? Portugal of course PTO’ed Venezuela earlier and have remained in ownership of the area. Ever get the feeling your siding with the enemy? It’s kind of like that. I’m a TEDEN supporter but this seems like blatant disregard for other countries. I know that is partially the point of going to war, but come on, you have to have at least some feeling remorse or empathy. Portugal seems to show none.

Spain

The U.S.A yet again has delved deep into the heart of main land Spain and has ripped out its still beating heart. Whoops, my mistake, Brazil seems to want to get back at them as much as the U.S does so they have taken as much and more than the U.S. has. It’s probably been this way for months I just haven’t bothered to check.

Switzerland

Congrats, Switzerland! Yet again you don’t have a congress! Of course that is easy to remedy but it will take a month to do so. Meanwhile we have the largest field of presidential candidates than Switzerland ever has before, with more parties taking part. Good luck all candidates! I agree with just about none of you in most subjects, but what do I know about anything? I hope you all win. Somehow. I will hack the system just for fun to make it happen.

U.K.
see Ireland.

Predictions

I will now make three informed guesses about random wars that will undoubtedly be correct and I will be hailed as a prophet.

1. After about 3 months, many RW’s , and lots of bureaucratic red tape the U.S.A will pull out of Spain, with a little push from Macedonia to get things moving.

2. Poland with completely withdraw from Germany and go into a 2 month span of isolation during which time Croatia will crush Serbia.

3. Macedonia will return noticeably onto the European map to fill the
place where Serbia used to be until Croatia took them down.

Note: These predictions should not be held as truth and nor should you make any actions because of them. The writer will not be held accountable for any failure to do so.

Thank you for dealing once again with no pictures, my next edition will care double the amount used in this one.

Glad to once again be the focus of your attention, Sgt.Chewy.