PEACE Totally Meant To Do That

Day 713, 12:56 Published in USA USA by Hari Michaelson
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Ha ha. Rub.

That is all.

-Editor-on-the-Edge-
-Hari Michaelson
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"We didn't want Croatia Anyway" Say PEACE Military Officials

In response to being handily defeated by the combined forced of EDEN and the Brolliance in their attempts to invade Croatia, PEACE GC Military leaders today issued a press release stating "Psyche. You didn't beat us because we totally meant to lose those battles."

"EDEN and The Brolliance totally fell for it!" said newly appointed Russian president Keks-n "We knew the whole time that the eUS was going to retreat our diversionary attack on Alaska, allowing the Canadians to block us indefinitely! What a bunch of tools!"

This report from PEACE held few surprises for EDEN and Brolliance leaders, especially following the claim that "Western Australia totally sucked anyway." made by top Indonesian leaders after their loss of the long-held Australian region to the hands of EDEN and Brolliance liberation forces.

"Trust me dude, we've totally got this under control." agreed Hungarian President Kolozs. "Finland has always been, like, our main target. Just watch man, we've got this."

When asked for his opinion on the latest PEACE statements, President Gaius Julius was unavailable for comment due to "a massive, Foster's induced hangover".
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