Norway: A Lesson in Norse Mythology
•
by Professor Evil
The war with Norway has begun! To my friends in the eUK, fight, keep fighting and don't stop till you can see the wall crumble. This isn't a border skirmish, this is an invasion, and we're doing our part to take on EDEN and it's bitter allies. To my friends in eNorway (not that I have anyway) this is more addressed to you.
Living in that lovely country of Jo Nesbo and Nemi, you probably know far more about your Viking heritage than I do. But just in case anyone reading this could take a refresher course, let's talk about Norse mythology, the viking belief system. Specifically, let's talk about Valkyries.
See, to the Norse, the best way a guy could die was in battle. Those plucky old sods that survived the various rape and pillage fests to die of old age were disgraced, but those young guys that expired on the business end of a battle axe got all the glory. When that happened, the battle dead were divided into two groups. The first group got taken away from battle by the valkyries, fierce warrior women who helped them all the way to Valhalla, the Norse heaven. The other half went to this great warrior's hall where they waited until the end of time, drinking and fighting all day with the others. Bit like Croydon, then.
Back to Valhalla. There's a problem, I'm afraid, eNorwegians. I've been going over military statistics with the drubbing we're giving you already, and I've discovered something I think I have to bring to your attention:
Now, don't get me wrong, I know no one dies in eRep wars. Otherwise the only articles would be Wilfred Owen-esque moans about the senseless slaughter and the game would be very short. But eNorway is going to be swarmed by the mighty British fighting force. You have no chance. Your allies can't help you with what's about to come. Prepare to be occupied!
Picture credit: http://theasatrucommunity.wordpress.com/creatures-the-series/valkyries-beings-2/
PS: Battle Hero! Feel a bit silly though, I used three WMGs. Still, they were due to expire soon anyway.
Facebook
Twitter
Discord
Comments
You all left to eNorway, and now eEngland is empty. Looks like we eCanadians are coming for our territories. Again.
Again being the operative word, me old Canuck chum. You lot barely had the stones to regain your own regions last time, what makes you think you can gain ground in the eUK? We can whomp the Norwegians and fight a war in our own backyard, you know.
A bit lame imo
You all left to eNorway, and now eEngland is empty. Looks like we eCanadians are coming for our territories. Again.
hahaha try it bro
gotta love BA eh.. Tries to come up with some fun.. NE's basicly the smallest country in the vicinity that is several times smaller then eUK and spouts nonsense like "no disrespect" and "having fun" while everything this does is making a shame out of your country. eUK has a lot of great people, but BA is not one of those.
V+S
This is military game! Don't I do not understand why some people get angry, will we attack a neighbor who belongs to a hostile union?
I dont think we'll be getting any christmas trees this december
Thanks Bardovka!