Join the new world

^like this but with more explosion

The people of New Zealand having been asking how this planet's unification will procede. Will we head west to our traditional enemy Australia, or east into the "Western Hemisphere"? Certainly the insolence of certain hemispheres in naming themselves "West" cannot go unpunished. But while East Zealand's actions certainly are offensive, we can't forget our history of oppression under the Australian menace. That and Carrot-Top. So public opinion is divided, and our so-called 'provisional' so called 'government' is afraid to take a stand, as pictured below:


^our government, indecisive and possibly illiterate

Well the time has come to remind the people that New Zealand Goes Both Ways! Only by a simultaneous attack on all fronts can the horrors of nationalism be brought to swift sexy justice. Suicide you say? The real suicide would be trying to make this Eden/Phoenix slapfight compelling. They fight like girls, but they smell like men. To insure swift victory we will have to make use of new and daring methods. In this (brief) pre-war phase, we must institute Ferde training in the art of adorable warfare.


^Ferde

Traditional cavalry forces were easily defeated by modern weapons. This is because horses aren't cute. They're basically just large pooping machines. But Ferde fart rainbows. Fart rainbows of love, tolerance and global domination.

Remember world, we want you to be free! That's why your being conquered.