Join the new world

First of all, my sincere apologies for a bit messy text (my mind is not much different anyway), but I hope you'll be able to catch the point. Though I'm not sure if there is one...

Here and there, one walks through the crowded city but does not find anyone he can talk with, or at least exchange some telepathic thoughts. Many people are around, but there are no familiar faces. They do not, at least, resemble those from your mind, your memories. There is not a single thing that can return the smile on your face because loneliness is overtaking your mind, and your body. And you don't even have a special reason to feel that way. Sounds familiar, right? Even if you suddenly meet an old friend, that’s usually not the same person you used to know: your life frequencies are not synchronized anymore, to say it that way. Some would argue that being satisfied in love and having many friends can help you. But what can you do when not a single of those persons really understands you? You love them but you do not feel them. Emptiness overwhelms. Do people even want to be understood, do they need a soulmate? Or just someone they can have fun with? Maybe both. I bet everyone needs someone special. And I bet many people actually do find someone who makes them feel alive, eager and happy more than ever before. But is it a real thing? They would certainly say it is. And… that was just one side of the story - a fairytale, with happy ending.

,,My fall will be for you
My love will be in you
If you be the one to cut me
I'll bleed forever’’



But why some people always feel lonely even when they are, let’s say, deeply in love and loved? They ask for too much from life? Dream about someone even better? And even if they do find a soulmate, they tend to break away and return to their loneliness and/or dreaming. Like if they were afraid to live, afraid to make a commitment and accept the not-so-perfect reality. Now let’s move even further and hear the third one, a horror story.

,,In the name of hell, these sinners never sinned’’

What type of person you are: the one who will do everything to keep its soulmate ones when he/she finds it, or the one who will throw it away and try to find a less perfect match? I’m a little bit of both, but, at the end of the day, know that I would throw it away. Why? Because perfection and harmony bothers me - I like harmonious disharmony. And I always say that if everything was right, I would make artificial tensions, just to keep fire between people alive. Disharmony produces high level of energy on which my ,,soul’’ feeds. But don't get me wrong: my intention when doing this is not to hurt people (though they actually feel it that way most of the time). The fear of seeing people giving up on their life energy, talking about being useless, worthless and depressed is why such behavior can’t be avoided. Seeing them weak pulls me down to depression as well, since empathy is probably one of my more emphasized traits. I’m afraid of listening talks about aging, temporariness of life, being small compared to the bigger picture etc. I just… want to stop it and return any purpose of life to such people, even if it's not a happy one. Also, it feels good to stop time… at least in our heads, since there is no cure for biological aging (for now). When you are constantly under tension, you don’t have time to think about those abstract things – fight or flight is the only thing that's on your mind and that almost certainly can’t let anyone stagnate and become passive. It’s a bit selfish, I know, since I rarely ask people whether they like/want to be ,,energized’’ in such way or not. I just act. It’s stronger than me… Some understand this behavior and it does not bother them (on the contrary); most of them, however, do not understand. Maybe, just maybe, this implies that my (and of those similar to me) actual soulmate could be found amongst chaotic people. And by ,,chaotic’’ I consider, not self-destructive person (e.g. someone who does not care for its own health) or a criminal, but the one who is simply restless. The one who prefers anarchy over order, the one who will say no when everyone says yes, the one who will energize the friendly group or partner in a non-harmonic ways… And so on.



What is strange is that we are usually attracted to people who are totally opposite of what we are. But how well do we get along with them? I’ll leave the readers to conclude that from their own experiences.

And, last but not least, buy gold from Pluto: