Lap Dancers’ Gazette Vol.7: A Filler
TellUrGrlThx
Dateline: Friday, January 17th, 2014 (Day 2250)
Location: Liberty Advancement Party Headquarters
Music: Just Get Through One More Article
Today’s LAP Dance:
: 1: Why Bother Reading This?
: 2: For The Commercial Break
: 3: Come 'ere
: 4: Poverty
: 5: Why We’re Awesome
: 6: Weekly Meme (Why You Read This)
Contributing to Today’s Edition:
Irule777, Maxmillian VonWillebrand, Sharky Malarkey, Lothair Carlovingian, Stephen S, and Party President TellUrGrlThx
Why Bother Reading This?
Lothair Carlovingian
Fellow eAmericans, yet again your friend Lothair Carlovingian of the LAP gets to talk to you. Because the guy who actually knows how to construct a paper, Old Man Custer, is having technical difficulties. This has become a week in which I, a rookie, get to try my hand. I figured we might as well be honest with each other. You are reading this at 3am because you have read all the good articles about the cool stuff happening with elections, alliances, and treaties, and now you have nothing better to do. Similarly, I’m writing it because I have to pretend I care so I don’t get in trouble with the PP. If I can write this, you can read it. We’ll push through together!
For The Commercial Break
Stephen S
LAP Congressional sign-up sheet link
The Liberty Advancement Party was founded October 13th, 2013 and was led by Irule777. By October 25th, they had established a member base large enough to enter the top 5 by kicking out the American Freedom Alliance. In October, the Liberty Advancement Party had 8 members in Congress and they had 6 in November. Although the Liberty Advancement Party is a fairly new party, they have produced leaders like NewAzazel, who was the ePresident of the United States. Want to make a difference? Want to do something better for your country? If you are interested in becoming a member in congress, make sure you apply via the Congressional sign-up sheet found above. This form will allow the Liberty Advancement Party leadership conduct the necessary background checks that are routine in any party and this will be the only way that they can judge your desire to become a congressman or congresswoman.
Come 'ere
Maxmillian VonWillebrand
Are you looking for the opportunity to make a difference in politics? Whether you’re a newer player or a seasoned vet, it’s never a bad time to become part of the driving force behind our eNation’s legacy (and have all the help you’ll need along the way). Join us on IRC on the IRC server Rizon in channel #LAP and stop in for a chat. LAP Dances For Everyone!! (Don’t worry, we’ve got plenty of $1 bills)
Poverty
Sharky Malarkey
Come and get it!!!
Here at LAP, we are proud to re-introduce the next step in establishing our mature party, The Feast of Kings!! We are currently offering 300 energy to any player, LAP member or not. Just fill out the form and the booty will be yours.
In order to further advance our offerings to the masses, LAP is also currently looking to fill a few QuarterMaster positions. If you have the facilities and would like to establish a mutually beneficial relationship, feel free to hit up TellUrGrlThx.
Why We’re Awesome
Lothair Carlovingian
Comrades and friends outside the party, hello to you once again. Is it not truly great to live in the land of the free and the home of the brave, and even better to get LAP dances there? From every mountainside, the cheer of our devoted dancers, thankful for your company, rings! It has been an honor serving with you so far, and it will be a pleasure continuing to do so! No one else loves eAmerica and LAP dancing as much as we do, so you should love us/yourselves a lot (especially if you are a noob, because, as you know, we are super nice to noobs)!
Thanks for reading, and goodnight eAmerica!
Weekly Meme (Why You Read This)
| | | | | |
Your Liberty Advancement Media Team:
Custer, TellUrGrlThx, Maxmillian VonWillebrand, Lothair, Sharky Malarkey, Stephen S, and Irule777
Support this newspaper and the LAP Media Classes by Shouting this Shout!
The Lap Dancers' Gazette Vol 7
http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/2364161/1/20
A Filler
Comments
The Lap Dancers' Gazette Vol 7
http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/2364161/1/20
A Filler
ZOLTAN!
Voted for the BBQ!!
That weekly meme is indeed reason enough to read this. That being said, I very much enjoyed the article overall. Thank you for making the news a little bit entertaining.
Thank Lothair he handled this week's edition all by himself. Titles, pictures, the works.
So much LAP dancing that my lap aches