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You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.

Kijiman for Kongress!

Day 1,311, 23:32 • Published in USA USA

• by Kijiman

Hello there everyone, and today I am announcing my bid for congress in Oregon. I've only been here for about a month, but in that time, I've learned a lot. Let me go through why I think you should vote for me.

Qualifications:

-I may be running in the Libertarian party, but I am the current Deputy Vice-Party President of the United Independents Party.

-I am an active officer in the United States Training Corps.

-I have a newspaper. (Yes, this counts as a qualification.)

-I have four cats. What's that, you don't like cats? Well how about looking at this photo and answer that question again.

Still don't like cats you say? Well then you might want to get your cuteness scales evaluated, because they seem to be off by about 7 OHMS.

-I am active on IRC.*

-I have a cool profile picture.

-I spelled Congress with a 'K' in the title of this article. (To match the 'K' in Kijiman.)

*this statement has not been evaluated.

Freedom!

If elected for Kongress (Tee-Hee, I did it again), I will single-handedly free every single region in the eUS. By myself. I realize that I currently only can hit for about 500 influence per kill. However, using enough energy packs, we can do some simple calculations.

It's basic math people!
It currently takes about 2,000,000 influence points (rough estimate) to win a mini-battle. Now, we just multiply this 8 (Amount of mini-battles to liberate a region) to get 16,000,000. Then we multiply this by the amount of regions currently occupied in the eUS. 16,000,000x35= 560,000,000 total influence points. Now we divide that by the amount of influence I can hit per kill, (roughly 500) and we get 1,120,000. This is the amount of kills required. Now, assuming it takes roughly 2 hits to get a kill with a Q5 weapon, that means I'll need to dish out 2,240,000 hits (clicks of the "Fight!" button). Ignoring my 400 health per 6 hours, I can recover 10 health using a health kit, which costs 0.5 gold. 10 health is equal to 1 hit, so I will need to use 2,240,000 health kits, or 1,120,000 gold. Now, at today's current prices, I can get 300 gold for 142.29 dollars. 1,120,000 gold divided by 300 is equal to 3733.33 purchases of the top gold option. 3733.33x142.29$ per purchase reaches us to a total of $531,215.52!

Now, I know what you're thinking, "Kijiman, where are you going to get all these Q5 weapons from?!". Well don't worry, I didn't forget about those. Now, tanks are good for 5 hits, so 2,240,000 (total number of hits required) divided by 5 (hits per tank) brings us to 448,000 tanks required. Now, taking current market prices, tanks run for about 40 in-game dollars. $40x448,000 is equal to 17,920,000 in game dollars. Converting that to gold, at the current rate (roughly 1 gold=800USD), we get 22,400 additional gold. Again taking that top gold option, we would need to purchase 74.66 clicks of that top gold option. 74.66x142.29 is equal to 10623.37 additional dollars, added to out previous total, brings us to a grand total of 541,838.89!

That's right, if you elect me for congress, I will spend every cent of that five hundred and forty one thousand, eight hundred and thirty-eight dollars and eighty-nine cents with pride, knowing that it is for the good of the eUS.

My real bi😛
Now, in case you couldn't tell, this article is fake (though the calculations are real), and I am not planning on being elected into office (or spending all that money!). I am however, running in Oregon as a blocker, so please, don't actually vote for me. Thanks for listening, and good luck to everyone who is seriously running in tomorrow's elections!