Into the FUTURE!

Day 830, 11:37 • Published in USA USA • by Gnaeus Progenitor
*Forgive me if someone else has already done this, I'm not stealing from them - I'm stealing from Conan.*


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... In the Year 3,000... [or, more appropriately, on day 1500 of the New World]


- Max McFarland 2 will become dictator of Mexico after he buys it.

- GLaDOS will come out of retirement only to find that Europe is somehow missing.

- Emerick will return only to find his inbox filled with links to websites with topless women and pictures of goats.

- Josh Frost will cough up a hairball onto the Erepublik World Map; this is how Afghanistan comes to be in the game.

- Woxan will finally quit the game. Only to come back 3 days later to rise from the dead and start a successful cult.

- The Erepublik Admins will finally put a head on the chicken only to find out it was an albino Turkey all along.

- Belgium and Switzerland will go to war to see who is more Neutral.

- Eugene Harlot will buy 2 Q5 houses - one for him, and one for his flying unicorn, Fluffymuffins.

- Zoli will become President of the United States; he will then bring the game servers down in an attempt to have the eU.S. invade itself.

- Astra Kat G will finally embrace imperialism after she accidentally recreates the rl Roman Empire in the game.

- V2 is released and the beta giants complain, no matter how good or bad it is - then proceed to talk about "the old days."

- The SOL alliance will break apart due to an argument over which country has the most disgusting food and the most oppressive government in real life.

- The eU.S. Congress accidentally passes laws which were introduced for "teh lulz"; causing a 1000% tax on moving tickets and minimum wage to rise to $999.

- St Krems will move to Singapore after Aeros becomes president. Singapore's name then will then be changed to some obscure and somewhat offensive emoticon that no one has ever seen.

- Due to a glitch in the system the United Netherlands and Kansas switch places - no one notices for weeks.

- Australia becomes enraged when it finds out that it has become a penal colony for disgraced American Politicians - of which there are numerous.

- The Phoenix Alliance will fall apart after the entire country of Russia gets banned and Hungary declares war on everyone for kicks.

- The EDEN Alliance falls apart after China gets a baby boom. The new alliance, and most of the world, will then be called CHINA.

- After the largest war in Erepublik's history, Iceland will own part of Japan, the U.S. will own Bulgaria, Hungary will own Russia, South Africa will own Chile, China will own Israel, and Peru will own Indonesia. New Players will join the game, look at the map, and say, out loud, "WTF?"

- The Technocratic Party of America will be the largest party in the United States and repeatedly save it from invasion with its cyborg militia. You're welcome.

* This article was written by Gnaeus Progenitor because he was bored *

If anyone has some good ones, post below 😃