I'm F.I.N.E.*

Day 4,827, 18:12 • Published in USA USA • by MaryamQ

*There are multiple variations on the meaning of this acronym. The one I have in mind is taken from Canadian novelist Louise Penny, but numerous others will do. Look it up, and choose your own.

Last weekend, my attention was called to an article stating I had been doxxed. I probably would have missed it if I had not been told about it, and I have spent several days trying to decide how or whether to respond. I had no wish to insert myself into the political controversy that sparked the article, but there are still issues that I need and want to address.

First, neither side in this fight seems to have any claim to ethical purity. If what I have been told is true, and CG’s article seems to suggest that it is, a picture from several years ago, showing me with Gnilraps and TheNorm, that was posted at that time on the EZC forum when we were all officers, by mutual consent, was shared on an outside platform that I do not use, without my knowledge or consent. That would have been wrong in any case, even though there is nothing that can be inferred from the picture itself, other than the acknowledged fact that the three of us were in the same place at the same time with some pizza. There is nothing unusual about that. Many eRepublik players have met at various times, and they have subsequently posted pictures on fora and in their newspapers. In fact, I myself have met additional eRep players, including another one in that same week. Reportedly, there was RL information shared about TheNorm and me, also without consent. While I have several times published references to my own RL experiences, as Gnil has about himself, TheNorm has been much more private about his RL, but I think those who know him best will admit that there is no more loyal, generous and kind eAmerican. Nobody has a right to share any information about either of us in this way, and whether not it is technically true, it feels to me like a major breach of professional ethics. That being said, CG is not exempt from charges of ethical wrongs. If he were really concerned about ethics, he would not have brought the issue into the game to score political points. If you have not been given information about another player by that person, it is safe to assume that it is none of your business.

None of this, however, is the reason I decided to write this article. Throughout my eRep career, I have tried to remind players that there are real people behind those avatars. RF Williams, with his satirical take on doxxing, which I did enjoy, tried to make light of this incident, but this is a serious issue in this game. You do not know what is going on in another player’s life, unless you know that person well, and maybe not even then. Many of us who have been around long enough have known, or known of, other players who died. One I knew, who was gay and had mental health issues, committed suicide. In these times, with political upheaval and a global pandemic, significant RL stress is almost universal. In the last year, I have missed the chance to see and hold new grandchildren, have mourned the deaths of several RL friends (not from Covid), at least 2 of whom died alone and were not found immediately, have missed time with family and friends, have been unable to rehearse and perform with my choir and orchestra, have undergone surgery following an injury, and have just learned that I need another surgery in the near future. Countless gamers have had to deal with illness and loss. Before you target another player for any reason, think about what may be going on in that player’s life that you know nothing about.

Finally, one more point. I have been told that I was considered collateral damage in this incident. I have one observation about that. If I am standing next to someone who is being targeted by a bomb for reasons that have nothing to do with me, it will not be comforting to know that I was not the target, but “only” collateral damage. I will still be dead. Think about that before you drop that bomb.

Sorry for the wall of text. I did not feel inclined to make it pretty. Thanks for reading, if you made it this far.

Maryam