Extended Deployment

Day 1,362, 09:46 • Published in USA USA • by Heather Fuchs
Dateline Psczwkyrldcjieczk (formerly Portland), Maine, Poland
1100 Zulu



Pole Land


Major Spamgobbler here with a little field report from the Mobile Infantry’s adopted home of Polish-occupied Maine. As we battle ONE from within on our extended deployment along with a large part of the JCS-led Military forces and other eUS units, I thought I’d share some of the things we have encountered in our time living amongst the Poles in occupied Maine and alternately kicking their arses and having our own handed to us. Here’s a little head-to-head comparison for you.



Another Pole, sans stripper


Food


Kielbasa, or Polish sausage if you prefer

Not exactly your traditional Maine lobster dish, but a tasty treat nonetheless. Often found at street fairs and wherever heart attacks are sold. Still, the residents of occupied Maine have shown their preferences, as seen below.


A patriotic American living in occupied Maine shows her love for the more traditional dish

Heart attacks versus sharp claws.

Advantage: eUSA


Women

Here’s a non-representative Polish woman:




And, for comparison, a native Mainian (or whatever they heck they’re called):




In a fair fight, I’ll take the one with the big stick over the one with the implants.

Advantage, eUSA


Men

Invaders:


Who plays European handball anyway?


Natives:


I swear, these guys still live there


Not sure which way this one will go, but I’m taking points away from the handball players for being in a lame sport. Plus the natives have guns.

Advantage: eUSA


In summary, I think our time here on extended deployment has confirmed that, while it is fun and exciting to experience new cultures, head to head nothing kicks ass like the good old eUSA.







Click on the link to join us!


If you are at least 5 days old, your strength is at least 500 and your battlefield rank is Lieutenant or higher (or you can do at least 85 influence per fight barehanded) and you like pie as much as we do, you too could be a member of the Mobile Infantry!!!


If not, then you could also get your fight on in the Training Corps!


Also, see this list of important papers you should be reading:





Respectfully submitted from the field,
Major Spamgobbler
Press Officer
eUS Mobile Infantry