"eLatvians easily offended - might be potatoes fault", study shows.

Day 2,093, 03:44 • Published in Sweden Sweden • by Kauge

VISBY — The exaggerated emotional bond most eLatvians have to this, for them precious, vegetable might have a connection to why they are so easily offended when people speak against them.

In a recent study made at Kauge University, one of Sweden's leading private educational institutions, findings have been made that the more eLatvian a person are, the more easily offended they become. And the potato is shown to be a common factor in all cases that have been studied.

Kauge Kaugesson, an ethnology and psychology professor, has spent a more than a decade studying different nationalities and their tendency to offensiveness.

"It's pretty clear now that when under threat of someone stealing their potato, as in one or more eCountries invading ones own country, eLatvians are the ones who shows the greatest emotional signs. It can be violent crying in public, b*tching about in eSwedish articles touching the topic or just lying in a foetal position in a running shower singing a Daina or two."

Recent news has made it known that both eSweden and eRussia had their go at eLatvia and erased the country from existence. This resulted in violent reactions and Kaugesson didn't linger to cross the Baltic sea to see the reaction for himself.

"This is extraordinary! All my studies are true!", he exclaimed while standing amidst a horde of crying eLatvians.

However, it didn't take long for the eLatvians to grow out of their grumpy pants in order to take their country back. But Kaugesson certainly has to thank eSweden and eRussia for the opportunity to, at an empirical level, study the eLatvian behaviors.

"Yes, I'm forever thankful! This goes to show that there really is a bond between the eLatvian tendency to offensiveness and the love for potatoes."