[PCP] PCP brings Diversity to Mongress

Day 3,930, 14:08 • Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom • by Pirate Cat Party

An official Political Party broadcast brought to you by Best PCP





Greetings Readers,

Although you may have not noticed it, unfortunately racism in our community has been becoming more and more prevalent in recent times. It is understndable to be concerned about what eUK may end up looking like if this trend continues. However, fear not, dear Reader: the Pirate Cat Party has already put together a diverse A-Team of experts to counter the problem from every angle possible during this mongress term. Without further ado, I present you them.

Roachford
I enjoy poetry, long walks on the beach, tending to my garden and slaying fascists on online discussions with my superior logic and intellect. If elected into mongress, I will continue battling the fascist propaganda and hypocrisy that is so widespread in our community.


Pannononian Nomad
Pannonian is the current President of our group representing the Lithuanian, Gaelic, Balkan, Thai and Quebecan (LGBTQ) minorities in eUK. As someone who is both Serbian and Jewish and holds citizenship of two different countries, Pannonian understands the plight of passport non-binary and ethnicity-fluid humans in eUK all too well. It is this understanding that has made him strive to make eUK a better place for all, no matter their nationality or ethnicity.


WayneKerr
Nothing grinds Wayne's gears more than today's borderline fascist society that threatens minorities with severe legal consequences just for voicing their opinions. Just as Nelson Mandela, Wayne also has a dream that one day even the state of eUK, a desert state, sweltering with the heat of injustice and oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.


AMD.
It's only fitting to assign our newest ally on the issue he has been most affected by: fat shaming. Fat shaming can cause severe mental anguish that can even lead to physical consequences, such as exercise. AMD will show you that there's no need for such nonsense and that you can be fat and kinda, sort of, almost function as a human by being an example of such an individual.


amscf
Like AMD, amscf got woke fairly recently as well, but he is disgusted by the rape culture and abundant gay rights violations in our country just as much as the old guard. It is his hope that by getting elected he will be able to ease the plight of these defenseless minorities. On a different note, if elected, amscf also plans to reduce the amount of eUK citizenship approvals given out to foreigners.


Mr Knee
Mr Knee is a staunch anti-racism activist and believes that special privileges shouldn't be given to people just because of their skin color. He will strive to bring back equality to our justice system and make sure that every perpetrator of theft, rape and acid attack will get justice served to them, no matter their skin color. A tough task, but we wish him luck!


Michael Ludgate
You may have noticed that Michael's posts tend to make less sense than usual as of late. You may have even pointed this out to him or someone else. If you did, you should feel ashamed of yourself for being an abhorrent ageist. Michael cannot help his senility taking over at times, but he can help other senior citizens of eUK by being their voice in mongress.


Rob the Bruce
Rob the Bruce: he wrote some platitude about gender equality so vague not even Tumblr could understand it, which is how we know it was a brilliant piece. I therefore place Rob as the responsible for solving the unequal gender representation in the demographics of eUK, eRepublic, and even the internet as a whole. We believe in you, Rob!


Jack Jockson
Jack Jockson doesn't really stand for any cause. I included him in the lower end of the list in hopes that we get a boost in votes from his research accounts in addition to the ones TUP will be sending.


Mad Pauly
The "Mad" in "Mad Pauly" is there because Mad Pauly is Mad because of how long the otherkin have went unrepresented in eUK's politics. This ends with Pauly's election into congress! His position as a media anchor will help our propaganda message to reach a audience wider than AMD's arse, a truly impressive feat.




So folks, when you go to the voting booths this election, remember that a vote for Pirate Cat Party is a bash for fash. Diversity is strength!



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