[OFFICIAL FED NEWS] We're Entering the Danger Zone

Day 5,977, 17:48 • Published in USA USA • by Robert E. O. Speedwagon

I'm using this banner so you know whatever I say is endorsed and authorized by the Federalist Party.

They keep making me write these things even when I know nothing about what's going on. I somehow stumbled into congress with a meme and was promptly kicked out (after two terms, which by some measures is promptly), and they told me I had to write about what our party is doing. I'm here to tell you some important news though, and that's who we've decided to endorse.



Alright, relax.

The Federalist Party has endorsed Iamthedanger to be our next presidential candidate for the United States of America.

Who is this person? Why didn't they write an article announcing their run? Why are they still using a Breaking Bad avatar despite the show fading from public memory and zeitgeist? They're probably a millennial too I bet.

I'm glad you asked. Take a look at their profile and you will learn that they like to hit things really hard and if that's not the most American thing, I'm not sure what else is. They also do something in Defense I'm told, but I'm not really involved in matters of life and death.

Maybe they'll say more about themselves in a future article. Maybe they won't! Sometimes pure rage prevents you from doing things like that. But there's one thing you can count on. That's when you ask Iamthedanger what he does, and he'll have an answer.



Or something like that. So go hit that vote button hard for him, as if it said "Deploy" because it's what they would want. (seriously, they don't link to it well anymore, so you'll have to find it first!)

Anyway, that's all I have to say about this. Being brief about this is what Iamthedanger would want from me.

I still have a mission! Get in the comments!

And that's the word of the day (this time endorsed by a top political party in your favorite country).