[MOMC] Story Writing Competition

Day 1,521, 11:13 • Published in India India • by ArawnLives
This is my entry for the Story Writing Competition.

I was smoking my first cigarette of the morning, resting myself from the exertions of last night, when I received the letter in the mail that was going to change my life. I was just wondering about how I was going to make my omelette without cheese, given the damned shortage. As every other Indian, I took a moment to close my eyes, clear my mind - and loudly curse the government.

Even if it wasn't the Government's fault. Cursing the Government is what we Indians do.

In any case, just at that moment, there was a knock at the door. And there was a postman with a parcel waiting for me. He impatiently twirled his whiskers while I signed off on his dispatch sheet, and then walked away without a word - not even acknowledging my thanks.

I grumbled at the rudeness of the world, and then opened the package - to find a can of cheese! And not just some rubbish, but some lovely Q5 cheddar. Entranced, I was just about to take it in when the rude postman returned, carrying a grubby envelope with him.

"This is yours too, I think."
"Alright. Couldn't you have just given it to me the first time?"
"Couldn't you just shut up and sign? I have places to go."

Moments like these really test sayings like 'Don't shoot the messenger'. In any case, the note I received read as follows -


"I'm afraid I come up with bad news. I have found out the reason for the
latest cheese shortage. Well I personally haven't found out. RRAW have
found it out but because I am MoR, I have a right to take credit.

The reason for the shortage of cheese is what we expect to be RT secret division.
Our intelligience suggests that Cal (head of RT) and his team are hiding some spare
cheese in a guarded bunker somewhere. From here it seems to have been given to newbies
illegaly i.e Without the permission of the Rat council headed by me and Sukton.
Hey! I still wanted a dictatorship.
Anyway the point is that we need some spies like you to help us."


This utterly incomprehensible note yielded little information to me, except that they wanted 'spies like me' - which was a joke, because I'm no spy. I'm a lout, just hanging around. Nothing sneaky or anything about me at all!

"That's why we need you", the voice came from behind me.
A complicated 15 minutes later, I found myself waking from consciousness as a rat snout descended towards my face. Some survival instinct kicked in to make me recover from my sudden heart attack in the face of the prospect of CPR from a creature that had never brushed its teeth.
"I'm alright!", I said while pushing upwards and standing as far away from the creature as possible. "Who are you? How did you know what I was thinking?"

"I don't read minds. I find it easier to read faces. Especially ones that are reading things I've written."
"You wrote this note?"
"You bet I did."
"You need to find a better editor. Or at least, use Spell Check better."

Clearly annoyed, the rat brushed past my criticisms.
"You're naive, silly, and can easily slip past them. They're expecting brilliant disguises, Mission Impossible-esque people, and all sorts of skullduggery. What they aren't expecting ... "
"What?"
"What they aren't expecting is a n00b asking direct questions."
"So what do you want me to do?"
"Find me that bunker of cheese!"
"What do I get?"
"How about ... 10% of whatever you find?"

So another complicated 15 minutes later, I escorted Mr. Glennu off the premises, with a promise for 20% of the cheese loot, whenever and however I found it. After he left, I did what I always do when I'm confused in this eWorld - I messaged and pestered troj4n20.

The minute I mentioned the cheese, I knew that he knew something. Because he told me not to talk about it ever again. But I continued to pester him - but a thought struck me, mid-typing away - where did the cheese for my omelette come from?

Vol. 2 of the story tomorrow morning! 🙂