[IBB4CP] IBB 2: Electric Boogaloo
Xander Kross
CP elections are nearly upon us, so let's have a look at the candidates. I promise a completely unbiased and fair assessment, such as you have come to expect from me.
Oinyo, Clan Wolf
Seen here with his traditional Veep, Foxfire, Oinyo is a blast from the past. And by that, I mean, "ought to be blasted out of a cannon."
He likes to remind us of the last time he was CP, when he was a master diplomat who was able to make friends and talk to people. He was so good at it, he sweet-talked Spain into... what exactly? They didn't leave until Rylde and Rolo and other like-minded "war mongrels" (to use Oinyo's Spoonerism) forced them out (AND/OR, depending on who you ask, because klop123 loosened their grip on our nutsack using the Universal Diplomatic Lubricant: cash money). Oinyo's method of dealing with them was to promise oaths of fealty and kindness, help them with French homework and make YouTube videos for them, while they treated him and us like pathetic dogs. He also arranged to sell about half of our remaining territories to other foreign interests, only one of which we still consider a friendly nation.
Now that we're occupied by two hostile armies, I wonder which master this Wolf will expose his belly to first. What will he capitulate to Croatia and FYROM? Maybe he can promise them our first-born sons, or future-active taxes on any lands we manage to wrangle back.
DMV3, CPF
Once again, McVicker snakes his way into power through the daisy-chain of hippies in the CPF, convincing them to elect someone they don't like as their Party President, and then endorsing himself as their CP candidate.
Credit where credit is due: the last time McVicker was CP, he managed to send eUSA packing with no treaties, no promises and no deals. He told them to go home, and they did. Keep in mind, though, that this was at the end of several months of expensive occupation, with a newly-elected CP who wanted to give her people something new and interesting instead of dull and expensive. Croatia and FYROM have only been here a month and a half or so. It'll be a while before they get bored enough to want to make a deal with one of our primary trolls.
He's also trying to sell his package of openness and transparency, as though that is something to be desired. When a government makes plans against an occupying force, is it a wise thing to broadcast the discussions? What's the sense in sharing that information with everyone? Operational security: it's a thing.
Quentin Carlson, PFC, and Shere Richard Parker, TMS
Good fellows both. Perfectly fine alternative vehicles for expressing your discontent with the major players. Unfortunately, neither of them has the swagger or the cachet of James R Bond.
I-Bleed-Blue-93, MDP
{*}
This hasn't been the most glamourous term. We're still in trouble, and the situation still isn't pretty. Croatia still has us in a stranglehold, and has the wealth and strength to uphold that occupation for some time. FYROM still has their stinking rat-holes burrowed deep, and since they no longer have any holdings in Europe, they won't be dug out of our lands easily.
This is the situation any CP would have been dealing with this term, and there was never any magic "off switch" that would have ended the occupation in January. This is the situation any new CP will be continuing to deal with in February, and there is still no magic "off switch." The only sure way to handle this occupation is with hard work and a focused team who know all the steps and all the players.
IBB is the only reasonable choice. His team is rock-solid, and getting rock-solider with the addition of Rylde as his Vice President. The War Machine is firing up to run a steamroller over the FYROM rats, and the Diplomacy Machine is working overtime to reach an understanding with Croatia. This is not a team that is going to pre-emptively capitulate to our enemies, or make things worse by interrupting existing programs. This is a team that is going to do the hard work needed to win the international dance-off.
There are no easy solutions. There is IBB.
EVER FORWARD!
{*}Comical anecdote - I had that same leather hat when I was a kid. I wore it on a trip to Philadelphia to visit a friend going to university there, sometime around 1993 or 1994, and lost it at a drunken house party the night I got there.
Comments
There are no easy solutions. There is IBB.
Still waiting for one of the complainers to step up.
And by "step up," surely you mean "Step Up 2 Tha Streets"
lol
I wear that much leather, but only to super-cereal dance-offs.
/o/
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~o~
>¤
I don't plan on sharing everything with the Canadian people, but I will share a whole lot more than we have seen out of the past two administrations. Opsec is extremely important, but so is making sure people know we have a plan and what's going on in general terms. The way it has looked the past two months our government has been throwing darts randomly and seeing what sticks (which has been almost nothing).
You're looking at a house with the curtains drawn, and based on the fact that you see no one making blowfish on the windows, you're assuming no one is home. What is the cabinet supposed to do, put out an article every other day saying, "Yep, we're still occupied, we're still trying to find money and support, our allies are still tied up and our enemies are still dicks."?
What information can be shared, is being shared, and when that information changes, it is made known:
http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/-cp-resource-wars-and-ibb4cp2--2492483/1/20
The information that cannot be shared isn't, because of operational security. That's not the cabalistic government trying to be shady and keep secrets, that's allies not wanting to expose their plans and movements so that the enemy is taken by surprise. You're the one that quoted Sun Tzu.
Oh wait, nobody is seeing the CP and cabinet articles because it's more important that your attention-whoring and campaign articles displace everything else in the Top 5 with bought votes. Well, good job, then. Thanks for saving us from ourselves by giving us a proper altar upon which to worship.
IBB and his Minister of Propaganda have written all of three articles all term. And if it weren't for the Resource War I doubt we would have got that much. I'm in the MU thread and even there information isn't shared ahead of time.
You guys won two battles and I applaud you guys for that, but at what cost? It seems like we have no long-term plans we're only dealing with the present and are not prepared if the occupation lasts awhile. The way we're wasting money on losing battles I see this occupation lasting awhile.
His "Minister of Propaganda"? Funny, he never mentioned having one of those:
http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/-ibb4cp-the-cobalt-cabinet-2483290/1/20
Find me the Minister of Propaganda there. Unless you mean Acacia Mason, who campaigned as the "court jester," but was never officially sanctioned as a member of the cabinet.
Anyway, since you're keeping such careful count of what IBB's cabinet has communicated, let's run it down:
MoD has been regularly updating battle orders. I don't have an exact number for you, but let's say one every 3 days or so to play it conservatively. Roughly 10 per month, or 9 so far.
IBB has released 3 articles since taking office.
Ministry of Finance has nothing to report because we're fkin broke and wiped and everyone already knows that. We have no money coming in and nothing to spend, so there's nothing to report there, but Aries Prime put out 2 MoF articles anyway.
klop has played things close to the vest out of respect for the wishes of our allies and because of OpSec. There have been no major MoFA articles because of these factors. What can be reported, has been reported in IBB's articles.
I personally put out two articles for the Ministry of Education regarding new social programs - the last one (about the Big Bro-Fist program) got buried underneath all the bought-votes McVicker propaganda and only received 12 votes, so I stopped shouting it in the news feed.
I'm counting 17 articles from the Cabinet so far. If you don't know what's happening, you either aren't paying attention or you're seeing what you want to see.
That's a surprisingly good summary.
(y)
Didn't know IBB was signing up for another month of abuse. What's wrong with him?
Diagnosis: Boogie Fever.
http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/-cp-resource-wars-and-ibb4cp2--2492483/1/20
Important CP Updates. Kept out of Top 5 by Vote-Buyers and spam.
Actually Spain left because Chochi and I paid them
With YouTube videos and oaths of fealty?
Actually cost us 100k cc 😛
Added a parenthetical edit to the article to reflect this dubious claim.
You and your backroom deals.
Gotta love a good CP election partisanship fight off....
\o/
Xander, lover of all things hippie, can't get enough of my big cannon. Blasting or not.
/Fame! I'm going to live forever...http://youtu.be/9yDrLZTgs08
I love 80s dance movies. All those big haired broads in Lycra and dance socks is hot.
That said, I am deeply disturbed by your leather hat. Was it a drunken house party, or The Blue Oyster Bar?