You TOO Can Wear the GOLD TIE!
Satya Yuga
"Give Johnson your tie," said P. M. Looncraft.
The complacent expression fell apart. "Sir?"
"Your tie. Give it to Johnson." Turning to the floor trader, he added, "Johnson, would you please lend this man your tie for the remainder of the day so he will be presentable?"
Ronald Johnson came to his feet, beaming. "Yes, sir, Mr. Looncraft. Of course, sir. I appreciate this, I really do."
"But, Mr. Looncraft," Lawrence moaned, his face dropping like that of a man whose proposal of marriage has been rejected, "I am supposed to have this another three days."
"Let me remind you that the gold tie belongs to the firm," Looncraft said aridly.
"But, sir, I earned it. This is my month to wear the gold tie."
"It belongs to Johnson now," Looncraft told him. "He has earned it by his concern and ernestness during a most unsettling business day. Johnson has performed with great presence of mind, and LD to recognize that service."
Lawrence stiffened. His hands stayed at his sides. He ignored the offered blue tie.
"I must remind you, sir," he went on hoarsely, "that company policy expressly stipulates that the gold tie may be worn for thirty days before an employee is required to surrender it." Tears were streaming from Lawrence's eyes now. This was a humiliation. He was being degraded for no reason that he could fathom. "I must protest this in the strongest terms."
"I accept your protest," P. M. Looncraft said evenly. "Now, give Johnson your tie."
Lawrence whirled on Johnson like a cornered animal.
"Johnson! What is Johnson? A sniveling wet-behind-the-ears trader. I have been with LD twenty years, and the first time you call me by name is to ask me to surrender the tie. I have attained the gold tie seven times. That is an LD."
"Duly noted. Now, give Johnson your tie," Looncraft repeated. His voice remained even.
Lawrence looked at the impassive face of his superior, then at the outstretched hand of the eager young trader, Johnson. "I won't have this," he sniffled. "I won't be treated like this. I quit!"
And Lawrence flung off the gold tie, throwing it in Johnson's shocked face before storming out of the office blubbering.
Ronald Johnson gingerly picked up the tie from the maroon rug, and after apologizing for his coworker's unfortunate outburst, began to tie it around his neck in a standard foulard knot.
"I can't tell you how much this means to me, Mr. Looncraft," Johnson said fawningly.
Looncraft rose from behind his desk. "I understand," he said, smiling humorlessly as he shook the trembling hands of his young employee. "Now, I want you to get back to work. You needn't trouble yourself with these well-intentioned concerns of yours. You have a bright future with us."
"I know," Ronald Johnson said, his eyes bright with that familiar gleam.
P. M. Looncraft returned to his desk, knowing he had chosen well. He had selected Johnson to manage the Global account because the man was, whatever else, conscientious. This was as it always was with conscientious men. Offer them mere money to ignore an irregularity and they would spurn it with ill-disguised distaste. But offer them recognition or glory, and they were your servants. It had worked since the early days of Looncraft Dymstar. It had worked for his ancestors, back in the days before there was a United States of America. His ancestors would simply wave a sword over a man's head and call him knight, and the man would give up his life for that title and those who conferred it upon him. It was the same with the gold tie. It was just a silk tie. Anyone could buy one. But when P. M. Looncraft dubbed it the company tie and forbade any employee to wear one like it, every man on the floor doubled his productivity to vie for the gold tie. Status-hungry traders who couldn't be bothered to earn raises because they were already earning obscene amounts in commissions were slaves to their desire to wear three feet of golden silk around their necks.
Still, Looncraft was disappointed in Johnson. He had not tied his tie with a full Windsor, and that was the mark of a slacker. Ah, well, the man was probably Scandinavian. Most Johnsons were.
-- "The Destroyer #81: Hostile Takeover", Warren Murphy & Richard Sapir
Comment below with what laborious obstacles and/or financial detriment Plato has driven you to throw at this game to wear your own three feet of golden silk on your profile page.
Comments
HOW CAN I GET THAT GOLDEN TIE!!!!!!!
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very well written mr spooner.
What writing? Just putting together what I've read in the past -- in the form of an entertaining scene in a novel I've read -- with the virtual reward system of this game. Don't you dare give me credit for Murphy & Sapir's excellent work.
Lysander Spooner II, I've been a big fan of the Destroyer series for a very, very long time. Thank you very much for using the writings of Warren Murphy and Richard Ben Sapir in your article. Any of you out there who hasn't read the series, in my opinion is missing out. I recommend it highly. The important thing is that you should start with the title, "CREATED THE DESTROYER" #1 in The Destroyer Series. After that I recommend reading "THE DAY REMO DIED", which is a reboot or retelling of "CREATED THE DESTROYER". I recommend this so that you don't miss out on the chemistry of the main characters. Lysander Spooner II, thanks again.
I couldn't agree more.
Gold ties are pointless, chaos is much more interesting.
That golden tie is quite irritating. The game needs more beer!
o/
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I plowed my Line of Credit balance so high that my bank doubled the interest rate on me overnight without warning.
That cursed golden tie.
Looking at your profile page, you have more pixelized representations of that three feet of golden silk than the average player. A perfect example of somebody who is an "EL" (eRepublik Labs). It is for you all that this article is dedicated.
My pixelized representations: Top Fighter, Ball Kicker and Cupid Killer. Then when it became obvious that the only way to complete future "mission events" was to buy Gold to buy EBs, I decided on some serious self-examination based upon my recall of the scene from this stated novel.
Oohhhh. Now I get it....
*laughs at self for being so slow*
Votado OME!!!
This is a "First Steps in eRepublik" thing, is it? The new kids need to know..... whatever this is.
That's what I get for using an Allegory to teach (warn) the newbs.
Great stuff. Not what I expected.
Tell your friends. I need more comments and subscribers. 🙂
OK, I finally read the damn article...
Where is the beer and brats?
I was told there would be beer and bratwursts.
I'm not leaving until I get something to drink and my sausage.
This sucks...
I could not care less about some stupid tie I want what I was promised!!
Oh, crap...
That was customer appreciation day at the neighborhood pub last week...
Never mind!
I would be more than happy to whip up something for you and mail it by post. 🙂
That's our dill...always ready to lend an element of levity to the serious, and turn what already has levity into the sublimely ridiculous. 😉 How're you doing, big guy?
Trusting in God and keeping the powder dry.
Howza bout you?
About the same, but using up a fair amount of powder in EZC. 😉
"Men will risk their lives, even die, for ribbons." - Napoleon Bonaparte
That would have been an excellent introductory quote. Thank you.
"I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country."
~Patton
comment completed!
Read, voted, subbed!
I heard you, Lysander!!
needs a picture of kanye
comment 😃
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hmm
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So, what you're saying here is all those decorations on my profile are worthless? Dang! Plato tricked me gain! 😉
ROTFLMAO!!!
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