Wherein I endorse Ajay Bruno for President

Day 661, 15:13 • Published in USA Canada • by John A Kelly
Introducing OPERATION COCALOLZ

Since Venezuela declared war on the United States and covered it's tracks by RWing the Southwest back to Mexico, many eMericans have asked how this country can and should retaliate for this idiotic act of aggression. Jack Flufferton's recent article (How Hard Should We Spank Colombia?) so ably lays out the question, the sentiment and the problems that I hardly need to re-introduce the theme here.

"Hey. Watcha doing?" - Emerick

Some of us have hatched onto an idea so mean, so twisted, so absolutely perverse that sworn enemies are willing to put the past aside and support their biggest eRepublik enemies. That idea is electing Ajay Bruno president of Venezuela, and I whole-heartedly endorse this idea. Wait. Did I say Venezuela? I meant Columbia.

Anyway, Ajay himself is skeptical. In our conversations he has expressed both interest and confusion. I think he doesn't believes it can be done (and certainly doesn't understand how), and I'm sure he doesn't trust any of us to actually support him. Well, that's fine. As grandpappy used to say, "if you build an opportunity for being elected president, Ajay Bruno will come."

So here's where we start, my malevolent mammalian friends: a form declaring your interest in PTOing Colombia. Here's a link for your shoutbox: http://tinyurl.com/cocalolz2

Preliminary calculations suggest that the time commitment (for everyone but Congressional candidates) is 2 weeks or less in-country and that this can be self-funded. We'll start the operation when there is enough interest and the election calendar is ripe.

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Update: No small intellectual debt for this idea is owed to eHungary, who taught me so much during the PTO of Estonia. Credit is also due to our Romanian friends, especially mihail.cazacu's The Carpathians Yell (see [HUN] And You've Thought the PTO in Ukraine Was Spectacular...), and Victor Petrescu's Continentul (see 3 Questions for Hungarians from a friend of your next President.). The obvious difference here is (a) they were spreading propaganda whereas (b) I'm serious about my intentions here.

The tinyurl for this post is http://tinyurl.com/cocalolz

Update: this article has gotten some press in Colombia. Poor fellows don't seem to know quite what to do with themselves. They've really written quite nice pieces, though, so go give their articles some love:
(1) In the eUS, Aeros' Defense Intel Review reported on COCALULZ in Second phase of World War 3 ends, Russia retakes the offensive.
(1) Eboril picked it up from there and broke the story in Colombia in his newspaper, El OpinOmetro, with this article: Operación Cocalolz... (a porpósito de la guerra). This guy gets the credit for breaking the news.
(2) Oscarckanoid has followed up in De-mente with Intento de PTO en COLOMBIA (URGENTE). Very sensible suggestions to the Colombian government in here, I think. Useless, but sensible.
(3) Jose Miguel followed on with a short notice in Diario Latino called Gringolandia planea hacer TO en colombia/ Gringoland plans to TO Colombia. This article hit the top-5 in Colombia on 662-663.
(4) ndvanderhoofven of eSouth Africa's Escher's Logic has an article entitled Operation Cocalolz: Ajay for President of Colombia. It's a short piece, but the author did some research and speaks of us in very generous terms ("narco-terrorists" heh).
(5) Eboril asked Zigman, the President of Colombia, about "the terrorist threat of a PTO" in Entrevista a Zigman Presidente de eColombia. Zigman: That's a threat that we know exists, the first step has already begun to communicate Benito and NO more citizenship, we must control who are citizens of Colombia, we can not give away our sovereignty to foreigners and leave it to them to decide , so I hope that for the next electoral contest will select the national unity where we can all learn from our candidates elected and prevent foreigners from taking over our congress.
(6) Arjay Phoenician's Grain of Sand ran an article entitled And the Next American Hero is… Ajay Bruno???. In the comments we find a comment from Ajay Bruno: "Operation CocaLOLZ is in its initial stages. I cannot comment further at this time."
(7) wars 7's National Reporter brought the Colombian news back to the eUS with Update from eColombia.
(😎 Zheng He's 2-Clicker Morning Coffee mentioned Operation CocaLOLZ in 2-Clicker 2-Minute Morning Coffee Summary - 14 September, Monday.
(9) The eUS government has apparently come on board. eUS Vice President Jewitt, in USA Vice President, Speaking to Those Stuck in Colombia, and Cynic Grim, in My fellow american's in eColombia and More for my fellow american's in eColombia make it pretty clear that a PTO of Colombia is now official policy of the eUS.