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This is FICTIONAL story about happening in Pohja-Eesti. I didn't meaned to harm anyone, and i am sorry for everyone who is in story.

It's a cold winter night in Finnish castle of president.
-SERVANT! Where's my sherry?
*A long haired male servant stepped into room with silent steps*
-Sorry sir, but i think that we're out of sherry.
*Fat man, who asked the servant to come throws the empty glass into wall*
-Fucking Okkius......
*Servant walks toward the wall and pieces of broken glass*
-Hold it right there!
*Servant rises his right eye brown, and seems to be surpriced*
-Just get me something to drink before doing that!
-Sorry sir, I'll do it right away
*Servant walks across the room to door*
-Okkius
-Yes? Do you need something with your drink?
-Not that, I just thought that you might need a new apron..
-No thanks, I've used this for several weeks, if I recall.. I got this when you won the presidential election in January. You could tell me finally, did you cheated, or does Finland really has more than 40% morons.
-JUST GET THE FUCKING DRINKS!
-yes sir
*Servant goes to cellar, and hum opening theme of movie called Star Wars*
*Okkius Pyramanius, the servant, goes to vine stand*
*His eyes open wide open, so does hes mouth two seconds later*
*Then Okkius takes a step backwards, and his stuble to his foots*
-OH MASTER STOGIS!!!! WE HAVE A PROBLEM
*Okkius runs to upstair to presidential office, where Stogis naps his expensitive wooden table*
-What's the problem Okkius?
-We have ran out of alcohol.
-Stop fooling me, and go to get me couple of bottles of Vodka
-Seriously, we have ran out of alcohol.
-I'll fire you from elite unit of army if you don't stop fooling me.
*Okkius facepalms*
-Stogis, listen to me. WE HAVE NO ALCOHOL!
-Seriously?
-Yes.
-No kidding?
-No kidding.
*Stogis's hands start to shake, hes face slowly turnes red, and his forehead is swetty*
-I propose that we go to Estonia to get some.
*Okkius facepalms again*
-My lord, we can't they are in peenix nowadays, they ain't friendly little brother anymore.
-If i need alcohol, i will get some alcohol.
-People will fire you, don't be a fool!
-I don't care.
-You should, how can you think that Muffe or anyone else from our mighty party will reach presidential seat ever again?
-I don't care, there is some peoples who are blind to our lies. Have you noticed that I reached the presidential seat even i don't even chat with those who have power. I don't chat with ordinary people anymore. There was some other presidents aswell. All we have to do, is telling peoples some lies, like "Estonia gave the Latvia way to Finland. This is our revenge". After that, 90% of people say that I was the best president after that... that... that moron who conquered Latvia half a year ago. Who was she?
-First of all, he was he, not she. Secondly hes name was Jorma_Ollila.
-Oh, that idiot who runs half of companies in Finland?
-Yes, we are talking about same man. By the way, there is some gnome downstairs.
-Is he called Gimly?
*Stogis seems to be exited*
-No sir, he is Ommi, the man who ownes half of the Finnish companies.. Another half that Jorma does.
-Why Gimli is not downstairs? He drinks a lot, he is not funny before drinking alcohol, he is old bastard.. He is just like me..
*Stogis makes a little "sniif" noise*
-Do i let him in?
-Sure, he can't steal the alcohol because there ain't alcohol to steal, so there is nothing to lose.
*Ommi walks into room with small steps*
-Howdy old drunken persident!
-Sup faggot
-Newer mind... I go to point directly, my court had a party yesterday. We had like 50 bottles of Vodka. Now there is no Vodka, and i am starting to feel the hangover. Do you have some alcohol to sell for me?
*Ommi smiles*
*Stogis rises his lips*
-No, we have ran out of alcohol too
-We?
-You are in this house, so you carry the responsibility too!
-yes sir.
-Ommi...
-yes faggot?
-I have a proposal
-Just go on, or i'll have to get my trollhammer from my slave wagon
-Why we won't attact Estonia? They have alcohol, they're in peenix, they are fucking weak, and i have lies to tell for the people, so they wouldn't mind if we do so.
-I don't care how we get alcohol, i care only about that we get some! TO THE FAGGOTLAND!!!
-We ain't attacing Latvia
-Sorry. TO THE PROMISED NEIGHBOUR OF STEALABLE ALCHOL!
-Do you mind if i tell you why not to do that?
*Stogis and Ommi shouts together "NO"*
-Yes sir
*Okkius seems to think something for a while, then he just walks toward the door*
-Ommi, could you give me loan of 500g?
-You? Why?
-Not me, for country, i bought some alcohol a day after i was chosen for president. After that country haven't got a wooden penny
-ANYTHING IF I GET SOME ALCOHOL!
-Thanks
*Ommi walks to the door*
-Smell you later faggot
-See you later Giml.... Ommi!
-Okkius!
-Yes sir?
-Now you may clean that broken glass.
-Yes sir.

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