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Ah Christmas. The time of year when people think of presents to give one another, kids think of ways to avoid Aunt Sheryl's suffocating and slobbering bear hugs, and Tiger Woods thinks of how to stretch a $20000 gift budget amongst 2000 mistresses.



I don't think a razor is going to cut it this year, Eldrick.

But this year, it's also time to vote for the Congressmen who will represent you into the new year. And who better to vote for than Alexander Keith?



Well, he's certainly well equipped to take on Phoenix...

OK, yes he may be a better choice, we certainly wouldn't have a shortage of legal elf labor, but Santa can't survive in Nova Scotia! Not even the tallest peak in the Cape Breton Highlands is frigid enough for him to set up permanent shop. Plus the whole busy bringing joy to every child in the world sort of deal. He just can't focus on the job.



Plus his other problem.

I can focus on the job! Plus I got other good qualities! Such as:
- I am a Canadian General (Just got the rank last month)
- I have Ministerial experience (I'm the Current Deputy Minister of Heritage under Prime Minister Jacobi)
- I have Congressional experience (I was a Nova Scotia Congressman from Sept. 09 to Oct. 09)
- I'm going to be getting some better book learnin'! (I'm going back to Dalhousie University in January)
- I'll have better internet! (Halifax internet is so much betteer then middle of nowhere internet)
- Come on! I'm Alexander Keith! What Nova Scotian doesn't like Alexander Keith?



The Trailer Park Boys like Keith's! After all other hard liquor of course.

So on Christmas Day, after you unwrap your robotic hamsters and your game consoles and your pairs of socks (Aunts. They never learn.), hop on your computer! Come to Nova Scotia! And vote Alexander Keith for Congress!