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Would you like to hear some feline muzak created by a very distant cousin of Josh Frost?

Listen my children and you shall hear
Of the life and times of not a deer
But a frosty cold cat
On the sixth of December, in oh-eight
Hardly a virtual avatar is now alive
Who remembers that famous day and year.

"Frost/PiginZen for President: A Final Word"
~Yes, I did gain a substantial amount of subscribers overnight. I wonder how that happened. Anyways, I'm going to take a break from my regular interviews to try something different and fun. You probably know him as Josh Frost, but there are many things you don't know about him. In this article, you will see how much he is just like you and me [End cheesy ending here].~





The parking lot was frozen solid from the lifeless air loitering the area after Frosty the Snowman decided to leave a little present. There was nothing outside except the frequent flickering of the street lamp Everyone else had left to catch up on their fantasy football teams as the Denver Broncos cruised to a swift victory. Adjacent to the parking lot was an extravagant Pets Mart with its inhabitants spoiled with the most succulent rats and minuscule carrot shreds in addition to a blasting heater. Oh how any animal would love to live in such a lavish life like that!

A faint meow drifted along with that wind. Inside a rustic tin trash directly outside Pets Mart, an exhausted tommy cat was giving birth. The sounds echoing bouncing from the smooth interior of the can could have mistaken someone for a constipated man taking a dump in the can. After a few minutes of constant tension, all was silent again.

One after one, a tiny cat was feeling disappointment for the very first time. In that trashcan on that very day, five cats were born in a smell litter: Max, Judith, Grace, Jack, and our favorite, Josh. Weak and malnourished, all the newborn cats huddled in order to gain some heat and stay warm. The runt of them all, Josh, was the only exception as he was licking the blueberry gum off the wall of the can. As a result, he slowly acquired rabies over the course of the coming day which eventually spread through the litter. Thankfully their mother whooped that virus right out of them. Literally.

For the next weeks, those six felines resided in that very trash can, longing to spend even a night in Pets Mart. One perk of having residence within a trashcan would mean free food and water. Sometimes around lunch, they would get some rotten banana peels as well as blueberry flavored plastic. If they were really lucky, they would obtain some already munched on dead fish trashed by the store employees. Oddly enough, there mother started to get more and more furious by the day with these living conditions.



While his siblings were off basking in their own filth, Josh could see the changes in her mother. The sweet gentle mother cat had become a short-tempered drill sergeant. And then one day when all of the kittens were asleep at the height of the moon, their mother left. Behind her left a neatly written note that entitled them to the deeds of the trashcan and that she left for better living conditions at the SPCA.

The next few days were tough on everyone, but slowly everyone in the litter came to their senses. They were all alone with no mother in a world of speeding cars and trolls. Furthermore, the small trashcan would not be able to accommodate them for much longer since they were leveling up quickly with the experience points they gained. Josh Frost knew they had to go their separate ways.

The next morning, all of them made their last dues and left the trash can. The sun had gone up by the time Josh had crossed the Denver Homeless Shelter. Out of suspicion, Josh Frost thought that he was being followed by curious eyes. It seemed he had grasped the attention of a permanent resident of the Denver Homeless Shelter, Crazy Catlady (or CC for short), when she was coming outside to have her daily trolling banter. When she saw no one caring to look, she swiftly swooped down and took possession of Josh Frost. With a misunderstood laugh (or cough, it is still disputed), she took him inside the shelter.

Out of pure astonishment, Josh Frost saw what the Denver Homeless Shelter truely was. From the outside, it seemed to be a rundown place for misunderstood citizens to citizens to thrive, but on the inside it was an intriguing base for the United States Workers Party, the largest political party within the United States. While hesitant at first to get involved because he thought he would get discriminated due to his species, he quickly warmed up to the United States Workers Party team. CC showed him the special vending machine of 'goodies" that she got to eat from. Josh Frost fit right in.



For the next couple of months, Josh got influential positions in party leadership ranging from party mascot all the way over to party lackey. Due to his hard work, the others would usually praise him with cat food. Heck, it was way better than whatever they had at Pets Mart at the time. Through time, he moved up the leadership ladder until he felt he would be the best candidate for Party President.

In January of the following year, Josh Frost won the Party President Primary for the United States Workers Party. Even before he was in office, he was breaking party records by being the first feline as Party President-elect. During his inaugural address to the party, CC was heard crying (or coughing, it is still disputed) in the back room. During his time in office, there was a decent surge in active players as well as general party population. Furthermore, thanks to him, the office building of the party from a run down homeless shelter to a food bank! Now none of its members would go hungry!

But Josh and everyone around him knew he was special. They knew such raw talent should not go wasted in any way. Due to the United States Workers Party, Josh Frost got a bit of exposure on the national government level. In a short amount of time, Josh Frost gained a bit of experience creeping newbie citizens and asking them them to get involved in their activities, what the government does best.

With national support growing, Josh Frost made the ambitious call to run for President of the United States on October. The public greatly responded in numbers and voted Josh Frost in the fifth of November the following month. He knew that the United States could not succeed in its own, so he made the decision to pull the United States into the eRepublik Defense and Economic Network. In EDEN, the United States grew continued to dominate as a international superpower.



The next few months, Josh Frost did not become President of the United States again. Instead, he was busy tending to his party and grooming his coat. During this pivotal time in his virtual life, he grew a desire to resemble his coat with hippie Jude Connors. Unreliable sources have told me that they have been seen fishing together as well. Even though Josh Frost took a break from being in the limelight for one month didn't mean he was not keeping prepared.

Josh Frost became President of the United States again on the sixth of February, thus becoming the first President of the United States ever to serve multiple non-consecutive terms.. Again, public opinion for his presidency was quite high. He worked cooperatively with his cabinet and got crap done. I'm not talking about Josh Frost pellet crap, but PiginZen pig crap. But while his presidency was marked with sweet success, his personal life was again plagued with tragedy.

Shortly after the end of his second term, Crazy Catlady retired. Permanently. The lady that brought him into the United States Workers Party was gone due to Real Life Syndrome. She was only a year old. This crushed Josh Frost emotionally. This bashed Josh Frost so bad that it pushed him to a lengthy coma. In that coma, he had to endure pounds of fatty cheeseburgerz and french fries as he also had to recuperate with Two Clicking Syndrome.

Months passed, and Josh still had TCS in his coma. And just a month ago, the cat was back. One witness at the hospital said that a bright light with sand punched Josh in the guts, thus causing him to wake. Another said the cat just woke up. Either way, there could not have been a better time for him to come back. In an attempt to rejuvenate the United States, he decided to run for POTUS yet again, but this time with an even more stellar cabinet in mind. The cat is back; Let's make the best of it.

I ask you today to vote Josh Frost for President of the United States tomorrow December 5th, 2010 in order to make the United States a more awesome country.



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Best Regards,

HobbitTon