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Spam?!

Under the admin's reighn of terror, today it is illegal (see paragraph 3.1) to post articles that have little or no connection to eRepublik. We, of the Ministry of Spam, can only regret such a desision. But let us look into the reasons behind this prohibation. Are there any? Have the admins told us why they forbade it? We don't have a clue. If there is any citizen (or admin) who might read this article knows the reason behind this prohibation, let him mail us straight away!! We are in desperate need of more explenation. We, of the Ministry of Spam, know that it can not be blamed on having to much aritlces, as articles only take a few bytes and are thus not endangering the speed of this site at all, if there is one thing that would be causing laggs in this site, it would be the new military mode. But the Ministry of Spam is not happy with the decision of prohibation, and in this article we will try and state, and also explain why this was a bad thing to do, and why the admins should again allow spam in the eNews. All support may be expressed in comments below, or petitions. We thank you for your loyalty to our paper, though we know it's quality and activity have been going down 🙂

Loyal readers and fans are always allowed to have their pictures published. Today, we have a very cool person, named Coolissport. He ran for CP in the eUNL but unfortunatly lost with one vote. Take care mate!!



Why Spam?

Before we can start with giving reasons to allow spam, we must first come to a good analysis of what spam is, and what it gives you.
According to Wikipedia:
Spam is the use of electronic messaging systems (including most broadcast media, digital delivery systems) to send unsolicited bulk messages indiscriminately. While the most widely recognized form of spam is e-mail spam, the term is applied to similar abuses in other media: instant messaging spam, Usenet newsgroup spam, Web search engine spam, spam in blogs, wiki spam, online classified ads spam, mobile phone messaging spam, Internet forum spam, junk fax transmissions, social networking spam, television advertising and file sharing network spam.

The sketch that gave its name to spam is of Monty Python's flying circus, and can be seen here.
Now, as Wiki describes spam, it seems like a very negative thing. We, of the Ministry of Spam, however, concider this not to be true. We, of the Ministry of Spam, concider Spam to be very enjoyable, especialy sinds we, the Ministry of Spam, have named our paper The Ministry of Spam. Thus it would be very strange that we, The Ministry of Spam, who have a paper, called The Ministry of Spam, would disregard spam, and concider spam to be something un-enjoyable, and thus concidering spam as a negative thing. Therefore we must look further into spam to see what we concider spam, and how we can give spam a positive feeling and conotation.



The Ministry of Spam conciders spam to be: random articles with random content, that serve different purposes according to the emotional state of the person writing the article, the hour of the day he or she is writing the article, the number of pictures and their content, the weather of that day, which in se influences the mood of the writer of the article, and thus his or her emotional state. The true purpose of a so called Spam article is various, as described above, and thus can only very hardly be discribed. In the first place, it is written to out a feeling of happyness, joy or drunkenness. These emotional or physical states influence thus the content of the article, and it's effect on readers of the article. Spam in that case, is a way to transfer emotions and feelings towards the reader, who, depending on the content of the article, his own mood, the pictures in the article, will have an increased amount of joy, sympathy with the autor, or repulsion of the autor. These combined parameters are the result of the described processes above, and, in spam article, mostly serve to nothing but to bring over the spam. Thus concluding that spam has no content what so ever might be straight forward, direct, but harsh. It is an insult towards the writers writing capacities, and should not be called pointless or without content. If it serves a purpose, how ever vage or unclear that that purpose may be, it can not be called without content, for the simple fact that it might not seem to have content, but it can poses a conciderable amount of emotional content that the evry day reader can not see, or might not want to see. Therefore we must conclude that spam, in a way, is more than spam.



On Spam
Given the time, our autor would be able to write a few more lines (or even more than a few) on this topic, but that will be for an other day. Today, we, of the Ministry of Spam, would like to tell you a few things. Why do we oppose the decision of the admins to ban all spam?
Spam is created in this game, not to advertise, give bugs or abuse it's readers computer. With a few exceptions, most spam written here has been written with good intentions. No one can blame us, the Ministry of Spam, who are nothing but a bunch of nolifers with no money or political ambitions that look for a way to express themself in a hard and cold world. Therefore we look to the eWorld as a place to recreate our lives, because we know how much our evry day live can suck. This means that this game, that is quite simple, brings great comfort to us, and to some of our readers that have the same feelings of nihilism or that are in the same state of not being understanded. Thus we can conclude that Spam, in a way, reflects the emotional state of the autor, and that of its reader. If spam, in this case no nonsens, contentless spam, is a reflection of a state of mind, it can not be other than that of an empty, not understandable mind of a young person, that finds refuge in the eWorld, rather than to look for it in harder and more expensive things such as drugs and alcohol. If we can conclude this, it is safe to conclude that spam has a function, the function of keeping youngsters away from drugs and alcohol. Thus we can conclude that pointless spam, in a way, is a measure to create a better world, because evry article might reach an un-understanded person that has a need for pointless or empty articles.
Thus we can conclude that spam, in this case, serves as a world emproving thing that should not be forbidden.
The second reason why spam should be allowed is a lot more simple. The idea of spam brings joy to this eWorld. Thus we can say that autors of spam articles can be concidered bringers of joy, hence the huge number of spam papers, spam articles, and people that read and subscribe to spam.
The third reason, which is not realy a reason, but more a state of mind, is that it gives a realisation of freedom, true freedom, freedom to waiste people's time with pointless, contentless articles, most of the time only containing waiste, video's or pictures.



Why then allow spam?

Why allow spam again? This is quite simple:
- Spam, as concluded above, serves a social-improving purpose, and thus, in a spirit of freedom, solidarity and improvement, should not only be allowed, but also encouraged.



- Spam, as concluded above, brings people joy and happyness. Why is this important, you might ask? Well, it is highyl important. Joy, happyness and other positive emotions that can be found while reading or writing spam lead to a return of the autor, or reader, to writing, or reading articles. This means that they will in effect return to this game. The point of this game is to offer people a place where they can find joy and happyness, so that they are willing to return. And all this serves one purpose, that is to bring in money. The real world is something that most people would want to forget when playing this game, but it can not be ignored. It is a fact that people, not only administrators, but programmers, and other emplyees, have to live off this game.
So, it is important that a lot of people are encouraged to play this game. The more players this game has, the more money can be made of the game itself, and thus the more the people who are working for the studio that made eRepublik can be sure of their job. Thus playing this game is not only a way to find joy and happyness for yourself, it is also an act of selflessness, as you are making it possible for a team of people to work and live of a game, and hopefully also take pride in what they created. This does not mean you can forget about the big boss of the game, who in effect doesn't want you to have joy or happyness while playing this game, he wants you to spend money. I'm saying he, because it is highly unlikaly that a woman is in charge of coorporation. This is a simple fact, and can not be ignored. Thus continuing, we, of the Ministry of Spam, can only conclude that spam, as a matter of fact, is a way bring more joy to the players of eRep, and thus to make more money.



This means we can conclude that allowing spam would be something that the admins should do, as it would bring them more financial security by making the players more happy and thus more likaly to spend money. Taking in account that V2 has made the population of eRepublik shrink enourmusly, we should also make sure we stress the fact that this might be a way to help save eRepublik from total downfall, along with other measures that we, of the Ministry of Spam, hope are beingtaken.



Out of our depth research we, the Ministry of Spam, can only conclude that it is in the intrest of the creators of this game, and in the intrest of it's admins, that spam should be reallowed.

In high expectations,

The Ministry of Spam.