Join the new world

Already have an account? Login



What is this?

You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.

Jokes edition 1

Day 1,913, 09:52 • Published in United Kingdom

• by mwcerberus

JOKES edition 1
Well welcome to this new article this one contains the funniest stuff I could lay my mitts upon but first a Valentine’s Day special poem.
Roses are red.
My mind is twisted.
Bend over baby.
You’re about to be fisted.

If you’re already disgusted DO NOT read on.

JOKES

boy: do you think i would get more girls if i was more assertive
girl: ummmm yer i suppose
boy: get in the van

I can't believe how strong the winds were last night.
I nipped out to get my wife some milk and got blown into the bloody pub.

A family are driving behind a rubbish truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen.
mum:"errrmmmm don't worry; that was just an insect."
son: "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that."

My girlfriend is a porn star.
She is going to be so pissed off when she finds out.

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide.
The librarian says, "Feck off, you won't bring it back."

My wife was gang raped by a troupe of mime artists.
They performed unspeakable acts on her.

I organised a threesome last night...
There were a couple of no-shows but I still had a good time.

Ok funny FB comments.

As it’s valentine’s day I shall forgo the usual sexy picture for informing everyone what my valentines’s day will/has entail(ed).

Please vote/sub/shout if you liked 🙂