In Defense of Two-Clickers: Revisited
Jack Flufferton
Battles are raging all across the American heartland and south, which can cause extreme confusion among non-military members, some of which are classified as "two-clickers", as they don't receive orders directly from a superior officer. While Eugene Harlot (O7) was commandant of the Marine Corps and Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, his newspaper was converted into the de facto Department of Defense mouthpiece - now we have an official DoD newspaper to direct the populace to the proper battle.
We were repelled in our attack on Russian-occupied New Jersey by a slim margin, an unfortunate outcome because a win would have given us the initiative against both Colombia and Russia, and we surely would have expelled them from the continent within days. When assessing the factors contributing to the loss, two-clickers drew the ire of highly active players for pumping damage into the wrong battles by not following the DoD orders.
Respectfully borrowed from Mainegreen's superb publication
Five months ago, I wrote my first piece, "In Defense of Two-Clickers", which was essentially a coming-out piece (or was that the gay emarriage to Ajay article?). Read it for context and a small rant by Emerick at a time when he didn't take the game too seriously. Although I hadn't really found my eRep voice - it's hard to balance concision, depth, humor and overall length - everything I said then still holds true.
Look, I have a lot of time to devote to this game, and I do so. My gal is fine with me spending countless hours accomplishing nothing in an online game that will be gone in a few years - some wives, GFs and children aren't so understanding. Some people play other online games that may soak up their attention.
This is a unique game and only appeals to a small segment of people, let alone gamers, which explains the ~10% retention rate for new American citizens. Feel grateful that someone would work and fight without being interested enough to join the government, military, political party or whatever. Really, no player that works and fights can drag us down, so long as they don't work with low wellness - that's the only harm they can do. Granted, they don't contribute as much as they could, but nobody can
Two-clickers are more important than ever now - if we treat them poorly, we increase the likelihood of them quitting. We already have a glut of understaffed companies, reducing profit margins for their owners. Imagine if they quit en masse - you'd go broke.
Most importantly, the two-clickers of today could be very knowledgeable, active players in a few months, once they feel comfortable enough expressing themselves in a world full of very opinionated voices. Do not push them away. Most people that have a good head on their shoulders don't want to sully their reputation early on by spewing unfounded garbage into the media, so you have to be patient with them. The game itself doesn't have a great built-in mechanism for teaching (although I don't know what new player walkthroughs with Plato are like now), so before you blame two-clickers, you had better be involved in the Department of Education or something.
You want a practical solution to getting more people in lockstep? Throw some of these goodies in every DoD article - no guy will miss an article:
________________________________________ ________________________________
On a side note: I smoked a few fat bowls and poured out some delish Colt45 for Emerick, even though he's not dead yet. Effing pigs.
Comments
Cozlamaxxxx
Lol. It would be funny to put a picture in every DoD. It would be pretty sad/awesome that it would probably make a difference to.
3rd!
I would NEVER miss an article. Ever.
Got my vote! ...What?
voted.
Kekekeke..
No one is denying the importance of two-clickers in economic/population building/wall-building terms, however that doesn't mean that their inability to follow simple instructions is acceptable.
"I would NEVER miss an article. Ever."
THIS
great. just great
It's funny that you mention putting a picture or something in the DoD orders because I made the same suggestion on the USForum. Actually I suggested just making them a little more entertaining overall...for example adding a new picture each day or posting a you tube link (something funny would probably be the most effective, but I have no objections to hot women either) 😛. I agree it would be sad/awesome if it worked, but fortunately/unfortunately I think it actually would.
Totez, James, it's so trite to throw titties in the mix, but it works 😉
and I like titties
Spot on. One of the things that has kept me in the game is that you really only have to be as involved as you want to. The political learning curve is steep, learning who everyone is, learning eHistory, etc, let alone what's going on in eCongress and diplomacy. Maybe somebody could compile a "Schoolhouse Rock"-style primer for new people?
"and I like titties"
Hey , who doesn't? 🙂 Well unless your talking about man titties, then...not so much.
lol dude 🙂
Good article Jack, very well written.
I don't have anything against people who simply log on to work, train, and fight. These are the people who keep our economy moving. However, what I do have a problem with are the following.
First, people who know that we are at war and see "[DOD] Civilian Battle Orders" but choose not to read the article. These people are just downright lazy. I don't want them to quit, I just want them to spend an extra 30 seconds to find out where they are fighting.
Second, and much more of an issue, are the people who read the DOD orders but choose to, not only ignore them, but to write newspapers going against these orders. They claim the government is inept and not looking out for the needs of the people. They claim that damage is best used in other battles, and encourage others to disregard battle orders and fight in the region of their random choosing.
The second is a deliberate, outright effort by these people - who have to be more than just 2-clickers - to thwart everything the eUSA government has worked so hard for. I know military generals who stay up late at night going over battle plans, and others who get up early in the morning to carry them out. These people spend every free moment of their lives educating themselves on the game mechanics of eRepublik and the constantly-changing battlefields, borders, soldiers, weapons, and funding.
Every time a noob posts an article telling folks to fight other places than the DOD orders, that noob is posting an article for the Global Community. They are saying "I don't give a flying flip about you, Eugene Harlot. I know more about this game than you, so take orders from me." They are wrong. And this was proven in New Jersey. Now, thanks to people who read the orders and deliberately fought elsewhere, Russia is marching swiftly southward into Florida.
Thanks.
~
Also, I do enjoy the occasional titty.
"Maybe somebody could compile a "Schoolhouse Rock"-style primer for new people?"
This. It is awfully dense to get into the politics of eRep, even just one nation. I assume for the most part you have to be a part of it to see how the pieces intertwine.
I would love to have a hyper-active part in the fate of our nation, but I think reality will dictate that I'll be doing well just to get my foot in the door.
Gah, sorry for writing a book here.
Its a sensitive issue for me though, as I woke up an hour earlier than normal on Friday to defend New Jersey. And than I watched the wall climb up about 60k above the secure line. Then the battle was over, and we had lost. California - where nobody was supposed to have fought yet - was well over 100k. We could have won NJ, and basically the war, if people had followed orders.
@WahooBob: Absolutely. I have a very short fuse with anyone who tries to pull that kind of crap. I considered addressing that issue, but I tend err on the side of the short attention span and omit stuff like that so my general point gets across.
Plus, if I were to write an article specifically about those points, I would be guaranteed at least three forfeit points.
I fought in California because my corporate interests are much greater than the eUSA
^ This is the road to fail, yet this is the main response I got from those that I mailed that day. Their business interests are more important than the welfare of the nation.
COUGHdividedwefallCOUGH
@Joe Jimini And you believe that your strength 4, Corporal (probably weaponless) damage all by itself can save them? If that logic wasn't so flawed, it would be funny.
1) Without the support of thousands of citizens, your company's state would fall like nothing. If anyone who matters actually attacks CA, the DoD (and those of us who actually follow orders) will be what saves your ass -- not your own pathetic effort.
2) Even if the state falls, you still have your company.
You are a selfish SOB and your answer angers me greatly -- I'll just leave it at that.
wow that would be effective, putting hot babes in the pictures, then they should say "fight in the right states for more of this" lol
I agree with your article in general. As was said by a few though, right now people aren't upset with 2-clickers for not running a company/for congress or writing newspaper articles daily. They are frustrated with active people fighting in the indisputably wrong place, like one of the commenters above who single-handedly saved California from losing it's 800k victory margin. With his 30 dmg. It is good to remember to be careful how we talk about these issues though lest we inadvertently discourage somebody who doesn't deserve the scorn our frustration can feel like.
"Plus, if I were to write an article specifically about those points, I would be guaranteed at least three forfeit points." LMFAO!!
Making the DoD more fun is a good idea. There's a place for being professional but eRep is rarely it lol. I endorse your plan to add titty pictures to the DoD orders.
I appreciate your link to the original article. I enjoyed Emerick's comment even if I disagree pretty hard that the forums "are p useless for new people."
As an aside I was surprised to see a 5 month old comment left by someone who now has a grand total of 76 xp and 0 wellness. This game really does have retention issues (also see eFrance).
good article. if the comment of spewing crap about the two clickers was aimed towards me, I understand. I wrote that tirade immediately after the fail in jersey. It was to bring attention to the issue of tring to coordinate our attack power. The decisions and means of implementation are left to those more experienced than me. if the comment was not than hey, good points all around. this is a game but we do still need to explore the means of maximizing our firepower. thx
Michael, it had nothing to do with you. Sleep easily tonight, my son.
cool. Just wanted to clarify that.
v + s
voted
colt 45 ftw
I am still new but I have read ALOT to the point I am understanding more now. I am just wondering if it could be that people are going to the known battle that they are ordered to but the server is placing them in another without the player knowing. Just a question i guess.
hi guys what's going on?
regretably i think both of our countries (i'm canadian) may need to be conquered 5 or 6 more times before we pull our ego's out of our asses and work together. both of our countries are built on a sense of entitlement to do whatever we want because we are the greatest smartest biggest dicked people in the world and whatever we think is right must be right because we thought it.
there's a reason our enemy is so ruthlessly efficient. at least the hungarians... they have found some magic way (possibly hookers and blow?) to mobilize the "citizen population" to fight for who they say to...
or at least they did.. now of course its a mess over there with the whole burgunland or whatever its called and the other RW's lol.
PS. ROFL at the guy who wanted to save california all by himself. good luck with your business.... if you were a real business man you would have scooped up the cheap import license and just sold what you could while you could.
Hey, Fluff. Glad to hear that the gal's fine with eRep w/titties, lolll ... Mine gives me the occasional hard time, and that's WITHOUT her having run across titties. 😒
Anyway, I'm only two-months old myself and had the pleasure of learning quick what it feels like to be overrun. My birthplace Quebec, in eCanada, was invaded by eBrits the day after my birthday and by eFrogs three days later. A short while thereafter, the citizenship rule changed and I turned into a Frog Troupeur (no Prince) and ran away to eGreece to be harboured there. Talk about learning the hard way. 😒
Anyway, two-click noobatrons have their uses. If they can be persuaded to move to strategic invasion-route points (California, Hawaii, and Alaska, for example), they add 100 pointsto the defense wall EVEN IF THEY DON'T FIGHT. If someone can figure out a way to get the 90% who don't stick around to migrate there, eNorth America could build up an impressive Zombie Army to protect it. Throw in some defense systems there too and bye-bye invaders.
I'm trying to persuade the folks here in eCanada to come to their senses. Spread the word! Defense points: Newfoundland, Nova Scotia, and Alaska (under eUS or eCanadian administration).
DEEEEATH to PEEEEACE!
MZ
P.S. Plus, helping out our allies is a good idea too. eGreece, in particular, is holding the eTurks at bay at the Edge of Fortis/Eden Civilization and isn't fighting most of the time. Helping out eGreece when it's in need (when the eTurks make another strong, yet futile, attempt) gets gratitude. And eGreece will provide assistance when we need it. Plus, it's got a high-iron region that's VERY much exploited ... great opportunity for trade.
Cheers!
MZ
eRepublik isn't made so you have to go and know everything that is going on in the world. Its more laid-back. I mean, some people like me or everyone else who reads Mainegreen's papers or similar do like to do more stuff, but its part of the selling point of erepublik is the freedom you have to do or not do that stuff. Participate as much or as little as you want.
That picture would draw millions to DoD articles.
My name is Yang Wenli and all I say in comments is voted.
'This is a unique game and only appeals to a small segment of people'
Very true! Only those of us with some form of obsessive mental issues play this game long term.
xD
i voted for the hottie!
From the standpoint of someone who is not YET in a military branch and is relatively new to the game. Let me just say that I have applied to the training division of the military and would like to join as soon as possible. However, no one has contacted me yet about this. From the standpoint of a "n00b" this just adds to confusion. I am sure I not the only one with this problem. We need to be more active in recruiting newbies and making sure they are active in day to day miltary activities.
Voted
Amusing article, but not sure how it solves the problem, as you are preaching to the converted by adding to the DoD. Specifically, doesn't deal with dopes like Joe Domini upthread, who do not understand the bigger picture about what benefits them.
Just like RL US. Sigh.