Horice for CP ?

Day 983, 10:09 • Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom • by Horice G Fossil
An announcement from the official
'Horice for CP' campaign office

"Horice G Fossil would like to announce that he intends to
run a seriously silly campaign for the office of Primeminister"

The Manifesto

Implementation of a national costume

To help bring a feeling of community to the eUK a National
costume will be introduced all citizens,excluding Marxists,
will be required to wear the national costume at all time.
It will consist of :
Moustache (Must be no wider that the wearers nostrils)
Knotted hanky to be worn on the head (White only)
White Shirt (Rolled to the elbow)
Tank Top (Pattern must contain Beige)
Trousers (Rolled to just below the Knees)
Braces
Wellington boots (Green)

Improve eUK Government

To keep the eUK Political system from drowning in red tape
we shall have a weekly Culling of the ten most waffle prone
members,to be voted for by the great eUK citizenship,
Also to help us keep track of our Political elite the wearing of
Pith helmets and Moustaches/Full set will become compulsory
for all Congress members,Red tunics are optional but a necessity
if you wish to rise higher than under Minister in the new regime.

Dealing with the Marxist threat

As we all know the rise of the looney left in the eUK needs
to be checked to accomplish Wales will be made a penal colony.
Thel eUK Government will then seized the communist communes
and relocate then there,anyone voicing lefty Sentiments will be
exiled to one of the new Welsh Reeducation camps.
To help us recognise if any of these undesirables are in our
midst all followers of Marx will be forced to wear blonde wigs,
Top hats and a dirty Macintosh they will also only be allowed
to comunicate using tiny bicycle horns.

Welcome to the middle of the manifesto

Well that the Community,Government and looney left dealt with
only eReligion,Building a better eUK,The Economy and the Military
left to sort out,I think it's all going rather well so far.
Anyway while i have your attention i'd like to put an end to this shed
business once and for all, it doesn't really matter at all, the sheds aren't
important. It's just a few friends call me Two Sheds and that's all there
is to it. I wish you'd ask me about my poetry. I'm a poet. People
always ask me about the sheds, they've got it out of proportion,
I'm fed up with the shed, I wish I'd never got it in the first place.
err...ahem....sorry...just needed to get that off my chest,
anyway back to the manifesto....

Religion in the eUK

Boblism will be made national religion of the eUK!
Followers of other false gods will be tolerated so long as they
are prepared to move to another country and not return until
they repent and accept Boblism as the one true ereligion.
Any who refuse to leave and are not willing to convert will
join the communists in Wales and be place in the hands of
Pope Woldy's heretic unit,under their guidance they will be
made to see the error of their ways hopefully enabling them
to one day rejoin our society.

Building a better eUK

As we all know the eUK has been falling ever further behind other eNations
to help combat this and strengthen the bond between citizen and state each
new and existing citizen will be given two bricks,totally free of charge,with this
simple idea eUK citizens will be able to help build a better future for the eUK!

The eUK Military

Plans for the eUK military in V2 have already been published
and can be read here V2 is here the Spamicans are ready

Helping the eUK Economy

Horice gives you the L.O.T (Live Organ Transplant)
Each member of the eUK community will be asked to
donate an organ to the cause,these can be sold on the
open market and all proceeds converted in erep Gold.
So come if you love the eUK don't give a little give a L.O.T !

Some Endorsements

An endorsement from Arthur Negus

"If i hadn't died in 1985 I'd have voted for Horice !"

An endorsement from Kenny Craig

"Look into the spiral, look into the spiral, the spiral, the spiral,
not around the spiral, don't look around the spiral, look into the spiral"

VOTEHORICE VOTEHORICE VOTEHORICE!

VOTEHORICE VOTEHORICE VOTEHORICE!

That's it,Now for the compulsory
Bra and Knickers picture....
[img]http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:qFa3Y26jaOIYdM:http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g113/vedranaa/01-and-now.jpg&t=1[/img]

Horice 😛


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