Funniest PM I've ever received

Day 1,415, 11:47 • Published in USA USA • by The Libertine
Avutardo to The Libertine | 7 hours ago
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"TWO DAYS AGO I SEND A MESSAGE TO ALEKSANDER AUTORITAS THAT'S ONLY A JOKE BUT HE HAS DONATE ME WEAPONS FOOD AND MONEY AND PROMISE ME TO MAKE ME CONGRESSMAN IF I BECAME TRAITOR :

http://i1129.photobucket.com/albums/m518/Avutardo/PRIVATE_MESSAGE.jpg

I TELL YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE A CANDIDATE FOR POTUS AND I EXPECT PPL MORE SKILLED FOR THAT. USA IS ENEMY OF MY COUNTRY BUT THAT'S SO EASY... DON'T BE FUNNY.

THANKS FOR HANTEBRASO. GOOD LUCK!!!"
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The picture enclosed is this:



Putting aside the fact that it's most poorly done photoshopped message of all time, some of the phrases use in it are priceless.

"YOU UNDERSTAND ME? ... I BRING YOU A LOT OF MAD SPANIARDS FOR ATTACK A LOT. ATTACK A LOT, GUY. YOU UNDERSTAND? ATTACK A LOT."

UNDERSTOOD!

"THE SAFEWORD..."

Yes, there is a safe word.

"MARQUIS WERE A GROUP OF MAD SPANIARDS WHO TAKE THE BASTILLA IN FRENCH REVOLUTION WITHOUT GUNS ONLY WEARING A LONG HAT. SCIENTIST SAY THAT THIS IS THE CREATION OF LONG CAT."

First off, that must be a very long hat to be able to cover all those mad Spaniards. Second, long cat.

"POPE BENEDICT XIIV ALSO KNOWN AS "THE MAD MATEMATICIAN" SAID THAT THEY WERE GAYS ... BUT POPE BENEDICT XIIV WAS A FAGGOT OR A MAGGOT."

That mathematician non sequitur just made my week, nay, month.

A^2's response is littered with horrible grammatical errors, of the remedial spaniardian variety, so there is no doubt in my mind that he didn't write it.

Even if he did, I don't care. This was the funniest PM I've ever received.

Best,
CRoybertine