Free Food for (Dumb) Thought Contest (And also more dumb thoughts)
Day 1,225, 11:54
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Published in USA 
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by
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by Chutley
Dumb Thoughts About Food and the First Free Food for (Dumb) Thoughts Contest
In keeping with today's Food for (Dumb) Thought contest, I'm going to share five idiotic thoughts pertaining to food. Then 50 health goes to whoever has the dumbest comment in response to the topic below. Here we go:
Asparagus is extraordinary. There's no other food in the world that can remind you what you ate for dinner the night before. In case you don't get it - that's a urine thought.
It is my firm belief that everyone in the country has at least tried a pickle once before. And I'm not talking about Vlasic or deli, necessarily. This includes whatever gross ass pickles come on a McDonald's hamburger. You can't possibly convince me you haven't had one of those before. And even if you've never tried one, I don't care, you've still tried a pickle.
Have you ever been eating salad and suddenly feel like a rabbit? If you haven't yet, you will the next time you put a forkful of lettuce in your mouth.
Shit seems like a waste.
Lastly, I feel like men did not think it through when they made "fruit" a derogatory term for a gay man. First of all, all men, even straight, eat a lot of fruit. Even bananas. In fact, fruit is one of the only phallic items we straight men will put in our mouths. Second of all, fruit comes both on and with a lot of delicious things, if you get my drift. This includes hamburgers. I guarantee you're thinking about what fruit comes on a hamburger. You're cycling through the fruits in your mind, thinking Chutley's an idiot. There's no such thing as a Kiwi Burger. Well shut your face because tomato is a fruit.
While we're speaking derogatorily, same thing goes for "fudge." I don't care what you say, fudge is delicious. The word gets a bad rap just because you can "pack" it.
My point is, if you're going to come up with something, fruit and fudge should be left out of the equation. If I was going to make up a name for gay men and name it after a food I'm reasonably certain I would choose Laffy Taffy. As in, "Hey, remember when we went into that Laffy Taffy bar by accident?" Or, "Dude, does your wife know you had sex with a Laffy Taffy in college?" Calling gay men a fruit is asinine. If anything, we're all equally fruity.
Now, the contest:
Let's keep it simple and see where you go with it: What's the dumbest thing you can say about food? That's it. Winner gets 50 health tomorrow.
Remember, it's so easy, a caveman could do it.
This contest was brought to you by the Charity for Imbecilic Citizens. Vote and subscribe if you'd like to see more contests and dumb thoughts.
Also, you've probably already subscribed to 16 Shells, but if you haven't, check it out: http://www.erepublik.com/en/newspaper/16-shells-220946/1
In keeping with today's Food for (Dumb) Thought contest, I'm going to share five idiotic thoughts pertaining to food. Then 50 health goes to whoever has the dumbest comment in response to the topic below. Here we go:
Asparagus is extraordinary. There's no other food in the world that can remind you what you ate for dinner the night before. In case you don't get it - that's a urine thought.
It is my firm belief that everyone in the country has at least tried a pickle once before. And I'm not talking about Vlasic or deli, necessarily. This includes whatever gross ass pickles come on a McDonald's hamburger. You can't possibly convince me you haven't had one of those before. And even if you've never tried one, I don't care, you've still tried a pickle.
Have you ever been eating salad and suddenly feel like a rabbit? If you haven't yet, you will the next time you put a forkful of lettuce in your mouth.
Shit seems like a waste.
Lastly, I feel like men did not think it through when they made "fruit" a derogatory term for a gay man. First of all, all men, even straight, eat a lot of fruit. Even bananas. In fact, fruit is one of the only phallic items we straight men will put in our mouths. Second of all, fruit comes both on and with a lot of delicious things, if you get my drift. This includes hamburgers. I guarantee you're thinking about what fruit comes on a hamburger. You're cycling through the fruits in your mind, thinking Chutley's an idiot. There's no such thing as a Kiwi Burger. Well shut your face because tomato is a fruit.
While we're speaking derogatorily, same thing goes for "fudge." I don't care what you say, fudge is delicious. The word gets a bad rap just because you can "pack" it.
My point is, if you're going to come up with something, fruit and fudge should be left out of the equation. If I was going to make up a name for gay men and name it after a food I'm reasonably certain I would choose Laffy Taffy. As in, "Hey, remember when we went into that Laffy Taffy bar by accident?" Or, "Dude, does your wife know you had sex with a Laffy Taffy in college?" Calling gay men a fruit is asinine. If anything, we're all equally fruity.
Now, the contest:
Let's keep it simple and see where you go with it: What's the dumbest thing you can say about food? That's it. Winner gets 50 health tomorrow.
Remember, it's so easy, a caveman could do it.
This contest was brought to you by the Charity for Imbecilic Citizens. Vote and subscribe if you'd like to see more contests and dumb thoughts.
Also, you've probably already subscribed to 16 Shells, but if you haven't, check it out: http://www.erepublik.com/en/newspaper/16-shells-220946/1
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comment?
What's a fruit?
So..food is supposed to have a taste?
Food is the word!
The stuff you have said is dumber than my dumbest. But I will get as moronic as my melon allows; hang on while I belt the grapes:
Cherries are not the pits.
There. Now go cut your peaches.
And by the way you have no idea if I have eaten a pickle.
Food is so lazy! All it does is sit in the fridge till we eat it. It goes through our body, and again does 0 work. When it finally comes out the other end, it's even more useless than it was in the first place!
Food needs to get a job and start paying rent, or else it'll just have to go.
i am dumb
I like turtles
The top five elite cannot wait to vote for PCP (Pumpkinette Country President)
Can't think of anything dumb to say, I suck at this. Voted anyway!
Steak is the king of meat..... bologna is the retarded cousin
My favorite meal is beer and cereal
Steaks were never parts of animals. I know, coz I get my steaks in a supermarket and they say it's homegrown! (in this case, home=supermarket)
yeah, im too stupid to be dumb
If erepublik was a food it would be a soggy waffle
MY APPLE TASTES LIKE CHICKEN
and I'm out
If food is so dumb, how come all it has to do is sit there while people eat it all day?
I enjoy a good pack of pickled pig feet every now and then
Chitlens are the greatest thing known to man
I voted and Subbed all in hopes of receiving free food... I'm an idiot :/
cheesecake doesn't have cheese in it...wtf
if you're not giving anything away then it's not a give away
Poem About Food
Food
Lood
Mood
Dood
Food sucks, I'll stick with Blood thanks.
eeehhhrrmmm if i stick grapes in my arse... i can digest them faster
Fried chicken is the way to get ahead in life. I mean, seriously, how can a Man from Kentucky get promoted to a Colonel with absolutely no military background or experience? By serving fried chicken. My secret to success? You guessed it.
F*cking tomatoes, how do they work?
Tastes worse coming up than going down.