Finland & Estonia - Forever together as one

Day 1,438, 02:25 • Published in Finland Finland • by Kuhaa

Finland and Estonia have been at war for a long time now. And for as long as I can remember, you’ve had an upper hand thanks to your strong allies. Time after time you’ve taken our land because we have been no match for you when it has come to a direct battle with our allied countries fighting by our sides. We would of course always take back what was rightfully ours but that wouldn’t stop you from attacking us again. But now the tide has finally turned, and as you fine gentlemen of our southern neighbour might have noticed, you’re being occupied by us, the Finns.



One could argue that this is not a big deal. We’ve took some of your regions before, and you’ve always managed to get them back. And as I stated before, you’ve done your job stealing our land as well. However, this time we certainly do have a higher ground. Thanks to the recent baby boom, we have got the manpower to not only occupy all your regions but also to keep them under our control. We’ve succesfully defended our newly acquired regions of Southern Helsinki while pushing further into your land, which is quite conveniently turning into our land as I write this. And you had it coming. Here are a couple of things I’d like to point out.

You are a bunch of treacherous thieves not worthy of any trust or compassion from anyone, not even your own foul kind. When you were a new born country it would’ve been incredibly easy for us to simply march in and declare all your lands our property but we decided not to. It was our mercy that allowed you to develop and grow, and for that you owe us your whole existence. We lived peacefully side by side, but apparently even back then, from the very beginning, you were rotten on the inside. It was you who ended the time of peace and prosperity by letting our sworn enemy Latvia through your regions in order to attack us, an action that revealed your true nature. It was you who threw the first rock, and it was you who betrayed your neighbour first, unprovoked.

But we understand. We are brothers, and as an elder brother it is our duty to guide you through hard times, and as an elder brother it is our responsibility to dicipline you when you do wrong. And you have done wrong. I don’t know what it was that caused you to turn away from us. Maybe it was a desperate cry for attention, maybe you felt we didn’t give you enought love, I’m not sure. But we forgive you. Because we are righteous people who do not bear grudge. We see that you are untrustworthy scum, even worse than cancer, but we also understand that you are lost. You are still looking for your place in this insane world, and because of that you have been vulnerable to bad influences. It’s not your fault.

We are here not as your enemies. We are your brothers and sisters, and we are here to cure you. Like a naughty child needs spanking, we will beat the bad behaviour out of you until you know how to behave. Know that you belong to our care and protection, and that care and protection we are more than happy to provide. So worry not! With our nations united as one, no one can do you harm. Please accept us, because we have accepted you.



And we’ll give you loads and loads of love.