eRepublik Poker League
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by Personal Jesus
Interested in poker!?
Interested in meeting lame people?
Interested in accruing large, spirit-crushing debt?
If so then the eRepublik Poker League is for YOU! Pretty much every night now for the last several days, a close knit group of assholes has been meeting on IRC and World Poker Stars to play poker with each other... The wagers?... DEATH
The rules are simple, Texas Hold Em, 1 gold buy in gets you 2000 chips and 1 free 2000 chip buy-back. The contestants play until all but one remain, who then has the arduous task of gloating on IRC and mocking his opponets testicle size. The winner takes 100% of the gold pot. Its a good way to meet some players of little influence in the game and to... make(?) money. If you find yourself intrigued by such promises of wealth and crappy friends, go to #usa-chat on IRC and challange some people. We usually meet up and play around 19:00-22:00 (server time) so, if you find youself up late craving some poker, join the IRC and cuss someone out. You can get to the US IRC chat by clicking this link: http://eusforum.com/index.php/topic,127.0.html
and entering your in-game name into the box.
You also will need to download Poker Stars. It is a free and quick (like my girlfriend, HEY OH) download that contains a decent poker format. Simply go to pokerstars.com and click download in the top left corner and follow instructions. Then all you need to do is log in to Pokerstars and search for one of the players.
Below is a the name of all of our players, you will see men of power and influence in the below list... ok, you will see one man of power and influence...
Sir Edward of Avalon (pokerstars name is poetofthepots)--- not much to say about this guy... kinda a dick, no one really likes him. Pretty sure he is into dudes.
Orbit-Fish (pokerstars name is orbit-fish)--- plain and simple, this guy stacks paper to the ceiling and rides on 22s... whatever the hell that means.
Nonesuch--- I think I once saw him win a hand... we let him play because we know he is loaded.
Weasle--- Idiot, usually the first to go out. He has yet to have the desire to win as he tends to get bored and go all in with a pair of 2s.
Enoch Root--- Pretty much just some guy, have a good feeling that he is a large, sweaty man.
AzureCuzYeah--- He pays his debts quickly... and once had a royal flush.
Five--- Has terrible luck. Not a complete asshole, which is nice.
PierricBross--- The man that needs no introduction...
JT Vanguard--- The guy that seduces young women (and small asian boys) at the poker table, watch out ladies!
Join us, and you too can one day be on a MOTHER****EN BOAT!
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Comments
As someone with no ties to anyone in the Poker League, I can offer a third-person perspective on this idea... THIS IS THE COOLEST IDEA EVER!!! I AM SO ATTRACTED TO THIS IDEA THAT I CANT STOP SCREAMING!!!
Thanks dude, its good to have a unbiased opinion.
sweet
EPIC
I have never played a game of poker with orbit-fish, never. Not once. But I can say that playing poker with him and a friend was the best experience of my life.
thanks! (but i can do asshole for a fee...)
and i love beaver
Aw. I'm not large and sweaty 🙁 There's a pic of me on the forums, go find out.
Def. voted even though you invaded my inbox and called me a greasy fatman.
Lmao Ouch! "AzureCuzYeah--- He pays his debts quickly... and once had a royal flush."
voted
lmao
lmfao cool
I think it is a neat idea. Unfortunatley I will be trying to stay away as I could easily get hooked on such things. And I have no gold just to burn anyway.
Have fun and good luck to all who partake.
When this is started up let me know. Thanks for the gold everyone.
This is awesome. Kind of like me.
When this is up and running be sure to notify me. 🙂
i may check it out
Hahaha.. I would play if i had gold.