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eRep wars: a new disaster

Day 1,813, 11:00 by Cooke4444
Episode I (or IV for money grabbing directors)

All of this takes place in an internet community far far away and long long ago.
NOTE: this story doesn't follow the eBelgian family tree. Why? Because it's easier that way, THAT'S WHY!


It is a period of civil war. Rebel spaceships, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil Awesome empire.
During the battle, Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the NINJA STAR, an armored space station with enough power to destroy an entire planet.
Pursued by the Empire's sinister, but awesome, spies, Princess Lily races home aboard her starship, custodian of the stolen plans that can save her
people and restore freedom (and with that boredom) to the galaxy...


A giant Awesome Womendestroyer (wink wink, nudge nudge) chases a small spacecraft. Many laserbeams of the giant ship hit the tiny ship and because of that, the defence shield falls away.
Two robots, the golden Olv007 and the smaller droid Jofroi try to make the best of the situation, altough Olv is worried about the outcome.

Many Rebel soldiers try to block the gate, which is used by the Womendestroyer to get aboard of the Rebel ship. Altough their opposition is fierce, they get killed by the entering LCC troopers.


Meanwhile, down at the desert planet Platooine, a young BrunoCND tries to spur on a little droid to work. This droid fails to do so and explodes. BrunoCND leaves on his landspeeder...


A black armored, with the most awesomness you have ever seen, enters the fallen Rebel ship. It's Darth Cooke...
Princess Lily gives the small Jofroi a message. When Olv arrives, Jofroi speeds past him to the escape ships.

A Rebel refuses to obey Darth Cooke and gets choked to death. Several minutes later, a LCC trooper spots Lily and stuns her when she tries to escape. Due to the commotion, nobody notices two droids escaping in a lifepod.


On Platooine, BrunoCND notices the spacebattle. But his companions refuse to believe that the Empire is near.µ


Princess Lily still tries to convince Darth Cooke that her ship was on a diplomatic mission. Of course, this isn't believed and she is send away to a jail on board of the Womendestroyer.
Commander Goopy points out that the plans weren't aboard of this ship. Darth Cooke is smart enough to know she send them away to the planet under them, Platooine...


The two droids, landed on Platooine, continue to fight with each other. The transport with BrunoCND on board passes by, while Olv tries to draw attention. At first, they get no reaction, but then they get drawn to it by a magnetic beam. They getted washed by BrunoCND's servants and put in some sort of prison.
Meanwhile, the LCC troopers search the area without result.


Olv gets "adopted" first by BrunoCND due to his knowledge of languages. Jofroi more gets taken too out of pity. While cleaning the droids, the message from Lily pops up (even without ads or buffering) where she calls for help for a certain Tommot.

BrunoCND's uncle, Pieter, sais that Tommot knew his father. Pieter clearly is shocked after Bruno asks for him, but refuses to help him to go to Tommot.

BrunoCND disobeys and races to the house of Tommot. After a while, his speeder gets stuck and he gets overpowered by some ugly, small people called "Wimpies". Suddenly, a person shows up on the horizon and the Wimpies disappear.

After a while the person introduces him as Tommot. When BrunoCND asks after his father, Tommot describes him as the most awesome person he has ever met. He gives him a lightsaber, which was an old gift from Bruno's father.
With this, Tommot explains some sort of thing called "POWA". This Powa makes everything what is alive strong. The persons who have the most POWA, are called the Zamiatinists.

Tommot tries to convince Bruno to go with him to Alderaan, to battle the Awesome Empire. BrunoCND has to take some time to get all this and makes himself up to go home.


On the Ninja Star, Goopypants is almost being choked to death as Darth Cooke finds his lack of awesomness disturbing.

When BrunoCND and Tommot arrive at the home of Pieter, it turns out that Pieter was burned very slowly to death by the Wimpies, which is quite pathetic.

Back on the Ninja star, Princess Lily goes through some hardcore SM-stuff so she would give the location of the rebel's base. (Giggity, giggity)

BrunoCND, Tommot, Olv007 and Jofroi arrive at some bar at Platooine, where the latest hit is being played constantly ("Friday" by Rebecca Black)...(Even then music was send down the drain...).
There they meet Konrad with his "pet" Critically, a hairy and smelly animal.
After some talk about money, Konrad shows him the Bisexual Falcon. There is some doubt about the speed of this spaceship, but LCC troopers cut the meeting short and they have to escape through space. They eventually manage to escape the Awesome Empire...

In the Ninja star, Princess Lily's "torture" didn't have the effect they wished for. Apparently she's into that kind of stuff. Darth Cooke has the genious idea of blowing some s**t up, in this case a whole planet: Alderaan.
Altough Lily says that the rebel base is on Headless Chickenooine, Darth Cooke decides that he hasn't seen enough explosions that day and still proceeds to go on with destroying a whole planet (awesomness dripping of the screen right? Right?).

While BrunoCND's training in the Bisexual Falcon goes on, Headless Chickenooine is being checked by the Empire. They only find some old remains of something that was used to be a Rebel base.

There are plans to terminate the Princess, but at the same the Bisexual Falcon enters the Ninja Star. After a trick, BrunoCND and Konrad disguise themselves as LCC troopers.

BrunoCND, Konrad and Critically leave Tommot behind and search for Princess Lily. Just when they rescued her, they get discovered and they have to hide in a large trashcan, where they almost get killed by some giant monster and squeezed to death by approaching walls. Luckily Olv007 and Jofroi manage to save them.

On their way back, they see Darth Cooke in a lasersword fight with Tommot. Due to incredible skill and awesomness, Tommot gets killed in a quite cinematic appreciable way.

After a space battle, the Bisexual Falcon gets away, into the dark spot that is space...

They manage to get to the Rebel base, with the plans of the Ninja Star hidden in Jofroi. Unfortunately, the Empire discovered their base and is preparing the Ninja Star to blow things up.

Konrad & Critically prepare to leave after they get payed? The cries of BrunoCND don't work, and so BrunoCND has to join the Rebellion army on his own.

On his own? No, a schizophrenic voice in his head says what to do in the ship. He has to trust the Powa. And as we all know, you can't mess with schizophrenic voices.

The fight starts and of course, the Awesome Empire is clearly winning. Only three Rebel spaceships manage to get into some kind of sewer which conveniently leads to the only weakness of the Ninja Star. After Death Cooke manages to kill two (easy of course), the voice(s) in BrunoCND's head starts to mess with the Powa.

Then some backstabbing Konrad & Critically count out Darth Cooke FROM BEHIND! The basterds.

Of course, the main factor of awesome is away now and so is BrunoCND able to blow up the Ninja Star, right in time so the Rebel base doesn't get torn into pieces.

Princess Lily congratulates the heroes when they get back and all seems fine...


THE END?

Well of course not, due to financial reasons I can get billions of cash out of it. Deal with it...






 

Comments

Lily Jayne Summers
Lily Jayne Summers Day 1,813, 11:03

lol at this story

+1

BrunoCND
BrunoCND Day 1,813, 11:33

Nice story, i need to find who is my father :p

MCKitkat
MCKitkat Day 1,813, 11:33

I am missing (me is sad)

but awsome story^^

Sequel please

MaartenW
MaartenW Day 1,813, 12:30

Don't worry Mckitkat I guess they still need plenty of e-woks

Gyantse
Gyantse Day 1,814, 06:39

No Gyantse, no vote

tommot
tommot Day 1,814, 09:34

Whoohooooo........if i'm to be killed, then i'm honored to be killed by his awesomeness Darth Cooke. : P

Jofroi
Jofroi Day 1,814, 10:23

I'm hiding stuff, it's nice but... Why am I on the rebel side? I wanna be in the empire!

boer jan
boer jan Day 1,814, 12:28

yep this story is al wrong you mixed up the empire figures with the rebels
Like LCCtroops would ever fight for the empire,yeah right....
Besides, princess Lily hates rebels (think you are confusing rebels with RB's) , if you continue like this your story will be bought by Disney before you now it

Elynea
Elynea Day 1,814, 12:42

While BrunoCND's training in the Bisexual Falcon goes on.

WTF ! :p

Olv007
Olv007 Day 1,814, 15:10

Golden Olv007... that... sound... just so goooooood !!!

 
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