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Chapter XVI: The very definition of a handful, a castle, a bear, a girl, and a grown man fainting.

With Sonja cradled like a baby in Conall’s arms and Raven riding on the back of Gaghar, the strange group began to make its way through the forest. Andrew stayed close to Conall, fretting that Sonja might not be comfortable and worrying that she wasn’t warm enough. The large man would just smile and say she was fine causing Andrew would fall silent for a few moments before starting his concern all over again.

After several hours of marching and pushing the nagging aside, Connal looked down at Andrew and asked, “How in the worlds did a mush like you get tied up with her? She is the very definition of a handful, you know?”

“I told you,” Andrew answered, “I made a deal with her dad.”

Gaghar shook his head. “It has been fifteen seasons or so since that one has been seen around these parts. In fact, Conall and I maybe last of the folk that saw him before he moved off to the outer realms.” The goat paused thinking and then continued. “Even then we found him up to mischief out in your world and not ‘neath here with us.”

“Always a wanderer, that one.” Conall nodded. “How long since you and he had your deal?”

“Well, it was just a few weeks ago I saw him. I think. I was a raven for a good chunk of that time and don’t remember exactly how long it’s been.”

“Consider yourself lucky, then. Most people don’t come out winning on a deal with that one,” the goat declared. “I myself lost a very fine pair of horns to him many ages ago.”

Raven, clearly not interested in the current topic of discussion, interrupted with a question, “How far is this court of yours?”

“We are practically right on top of it.” Gaghar replied. “We just need to get up top of that rise and we should see the tops of the towers.”

Andrew stopped suddenly. So much so in fact that Conall ran into the back of him.

“What’s a matter there, mush?”

Andrew found a nice large rock and sat down on it. “First off, can you stop calling me mush? I don’t so much mind when she does it, but it sounds wrong coming from the two of you.”

Conall grinned as usual. “Sorry , uh… pal? It is just our way, innit? Still, what is with the resting? We are almost there.”

“I just didn’t expect to be here so soon.” He looked at Sonja who was sleeping comfortably in the giant’s arms. “I just… guess it’s time to find my wife.”

“Bleet?” Gaghar asked. “What is this about a wife?”

So, then, to Gaghar and Conall’s astonishment, which they hid from Andrew rather well, he related his side of his wife’s abduction.

“So, you figure,” Gagahar said when Andrew had finished, “that you can just walk up to the Queen and demand this wife back and that will be that?”

“Tell you the truth, Mr. Goat, I never really thought about it. I was just chasing after her. Didn’t really give much though what to do after I caught her.”

“Just like a mush.” Gaghar said, and then quickly added, “Sorry, I mean… uh… just like a yuu-man bean.”

“Well, I very well can not stand here waiting for you to figure it out,” Conall said. “The Queen is going to be very pleased that you brought this one back to her court and may very well be put into the mood of granting a favor to you.”

“Is she in some kind of trouble, cause if we are taking her back just for her…”

“Calm down, she is not in any trouble. She has just been gone from court for a long, long time. Queen wants to find out where her mind is at or something.”

Andrew stood up and shook his head. “Okay, let’s do it.”

So they did and shortly they were up on the rise looking across a small clearing and across to the Castle and Court of the Faerie Queen. It wasn’t as big as Andrew would have thought, but it was a beautiful. White walls, red wooden trim and wondrous stonework, it certainly looked like a place a Queen would live.


They first came to a gate where a rather large bear stood guard with a little girl in abnormally large glasses. Funny enough, it wasn’t the bear in the roman centurion outfit that drew Andrew’s attention but child. She looked as if she was 7 year old and easily pushed around, but Andrew had been running around this world long enough to know that things were never really as they seemed.

“State your business,” the little girl said as the bear lowered his spear.


“Just a quick delivery and maybe a meal.” Gaghar said.


Behind her large rims and soft lenses, the little girl rolled her eyes. “I thought the Queen said for you two to make yourself scarce for the next century or so.”

The bear growled.

“Nice hat.” Raven said before being quickly shhhed by Andrew.

Conall stepped forward and knelt down, letting both bear and girl see whom he was carrying. “I think the queen will let us have a bit of soup for bringing this one back to her.”

The little girl glanced over at her partner who just nodded gently. She reached out and grabbed Gaghar by the horns and whispered something in his ear.


He quickly nodded. “Of course, Mistress S-Sammi.”

The two guards moved off the gate and let them forward.

“She’s a tough one,” Raven commented.

Conall agreed. “She was the hero of Cét-chath Maige Tuired She is very tough.”

“Bah!” Gaghar said. “Just cause she helped drive the Fir Bolg to the sea doesn’t mean that she should lord it over us like that. I could have helped. I just had a touch of the sick that day.”

Raven hopped from Gaghar’s back and took a slightly hovering position in front of them. “What did she say to you? She gonna stew you up? I hear good things about Goat Stew.”

Gaghar took a mock charge at the bird. He reared up on his hind legs and snarled. “I’ll see you in a stew, bird!” the goat called out.

Raven twisted away with a single flap and rose out of the reach.

Andrew started to laugh when he heard someone call out his name. He turned and looked across a patch of grass.

There was his wife.

Colleen stood there in a simple light green dress looking as beautiful as ever. She looked beautiful and older. An easy ten years older than when he had last seen her. She also held the hand of a small child who stood quietly at her side and there was an infant sleeping in her arms.

“Colleen?” he said, unsure of what he was seeing. He blinked once. He blinked again. It made no sense.

“Well, look at you.” She said stepping across the grass towards him. “It’s been a long time.”

“Long time?” Andrew stammered, taking a few stumbles backwards. “What? But… just…Long time?”

“It’s been fifteen years, honey.” She replied. “Now, come meet my kids,”

Andrew promptly fainted.