Bringing the light of Dio to the heretics

Day 1,667, 14:50 • Published in Japan Japan • by Fruitcommando

Hello citizens of eJapan and loyal subscribers, It is my pleasure to announce that I will be running for PP of Sakurakai. Now, you may be wondering why I would choose this party to spread the glory of Dio to and the answer is quite simple really. If you look at the party members you can see this party has the most pork per capita (PPC), in fact the levels of pork in this party are quite appalling. Therefore I am going to be changing this party around. My current goals as PP will be the following:

Removing the swine from the party

The first and most important step to fixing this party and converting it will be removing the swine that cannot be enlightened, this includes the kazawanese/swede mutated members, I feel sorry to remove a fellow Kazakh but there is no cure for the Kazawanese who have been infected at this point - I assure you however there is certainly a cure being worked on!
Converting the non-infected

for too long(about 3 months) the populace of eJapan has been subjected to the propaganda of the Squibeel/Sumeragi Regime, but do not worry Japan I am here to show you the loving embrace of Dio! The main reason I had left JDM to convert this party was I saw that the populace was suffering, this is because they had a void in them, this void is the fact they lack the LOVE of Dio. No longer shall I sit by and watch as the citizens of eJapan slowly decay in the web of lies that is the Sumeragi Propaganda, It is safe to assume that those who do not accept Dioism is too far gone and must be removed from this country to save it! Therefore converting to Dioism will be mandatory for our salvation.
Reclaiming the lands conquered by swine

one of our biggest goals in this party will be reclaiming the land lost to mutated kazawanese, for one the pig stench is ruining my lovely air here in HokkaDIO(yes it reaches that far!) and while it truly does hurt me to slaughter a kazawanese, these foreign invaders must be removed by force. Our party will help facilitate this by working close with the JLA and supplying them PAK-47s in their effort to save us.

thus concludes my goals for this month should I become PP
In closing, I ask that you begin reading the holy book in preparation for the coming crusade, and to embrace the love of Dio and vote for der Kaiser FructeKommandante in the coming elections.

thank you for reading,

-Der Kaiser FructeKommandante